"I know it's awkward with your knees and the handlebars, but go ahead and insert it so that it's comfortable," the Web master says. "Now just wank a little until you get off."

"I don't know if I can get off like this," Sateen suggests. "I'm too lubey."

"Get some baby wipes for her to take care of that lube," Tomcat directs the PA.

Eventually, using another machine called "the predator," Sateen starts screaming in a way that marks this whole scene, again, as something that could only happen in the world of Porn 2.0. She's had a genuine orgasm, the kind of thing you'd almost never see a woman do in porn before the Web took over.

Ten minutes later, still shaking and sweaty, Sateen pulls on a robe and stumbles over to the snack table. She falls into a chair and lets out her breath in a whoosh.

"Hard work, eh?" she sighs, grinning at me. "Having orgasms all day?" SFBG

Annalee Newitz is a surly media nerd who's never met a machine she didn't like.