You'll even find someone just as much to your liking eventually, but he won't be just a nice version of the shit, so don't waste your time looking for that. Such a quest is doomed to fail, not to mention make the not-shitty guys you do meet think you're kind of messed up in a not-all-that-appealing way.
Oh, and one last thing there's nothing gender-politics related about your situation, so don't go getting your feminist sensibility in a wad. You think guys don't lose their fool hearts to girls who are perfect for them in every way except for being cold and cruel and maybe a little crazy? Where would great art be without the Cruel Mistress or La Belle Dame sans Merci? In Barneyland, that's where. "I love you, you love me" makes for a very nice LTR, but you can't dance to it.
Andrea Nemerson has spent the last 14 years as a sex educator and an instructor of sex educators. In her previous life she was a prop designer. And she's raising twins, so she's one bad mother of a sex adviser. Visit www.altsexcolumn.com to view her previous columns.