Back when you were doing the friend with benefits thing, how much of a shit was he being about it? As I've said before, the FWB arrangement can be a mutual satisfaction device like no other, or an instrument of torture. What if one "friend" gets attached and the other continues to pull up pants and say "see ya!" and shrug off any pleas for more time, care, or affection, since after all, we're all just friends here? That's your shit for you. So which one was he? Shit/not shit, and if shit, has he outgrown it yet?
If you do meet, you can always tell him that his actions caused you pain and see how he takes it. That should work as a shitometer, I'd think. If he laughs you off, unfriend, unfriend!
See Andrea's other column at carnalnation.com.