Tick, tock, it's panic o'clock, Christmas shoppers
SHOPPING Dearest Christian and Christian-adjacent reader: it's too late for the Internet. Unless you want to shell out Santa-sized bucks for overnight delivery, you're gonna have to fill those loved-ones' stocking IRL, with a good ol' fashioned brick-and-mortar dash through the metaphorical snow.
We mean you're going to have to go shopping, duh. And your flight leaves on Saturday, or their flight lands on Friday, or you're actually on your way to a holiday house party tonight! You can do better than a gift card. Yet even though you seem surrounded by retail options every moment of your life, when you're forced to suddenly think about what to get tea party maven Aunt Tilly or your nine-year-old second cousin who you think is named Erica (Caitlin? Amy? Danica?) or your drunk sort-of-friends, the mind blanks and the plan nogs.
So some of the options below may seem obvious any other time of year, but here they are to help kickstart your Christmas consumer creativity motors. get ready to fill your sack with goodies! (Don't forget to bring your own sack.)
GREEN APPLE BOOKS AND MUSIC
Calendars, calendars, calendars! No gift crisis cannot be solved by a glossy 2013 calendar featuring soft-focus lighthouses of Nova Scotia, baby baboons smearing ice cream in their hair, or various memes of yesteryear, repackaged helpfully for the Web-tardy. Oh, by the way, Green Apple is the largest bookstore in California, so there are books — and extremely helpful staff recommendations! — for everyone on your listicle.
506 Clement, SF. (415) 387-2272, www.greenapplebooks.com
Heartfelt is the very definition of a last-minute gift emporium, a place filled with low-cost creative items for all ages. Italian cookware, spandex log pillows, a hanging mobile you can customize with your own art ... it's an affordable world of creativity at your fingertips in Bernal Heights! Joke gifts (really creative ones), retro gifts, classic gifts, cool stuff you won't see anywhere else .. you can cover almost everyone on your list in one heartfelt stop.
436 Cortland, SF. (415) 648-1380, www.heartfeltsf.com
22ND ANNUAL TELEGRAPH AVENUE HOLIDAY STREET FAIR
OK, more than 200 artists are showing off their goods all weekend in Berkeley — pottery, jewelry, t-shirts, hats, wall art, candles, leatherwork — surely you can find something for your dad while enjoying all the colorful characters, groovy tunes, and interesting eats that Berkeley can bring? It's a bargain bonanza.
Dec 22-24, 11am-6pm, free. Between Dwight Way and Bancroft Way, Berk. www.telegraphfair.com
THE CANDY STORE
There are handmade smores. There are marshmallows made of vanilla and Maker's Mark. Adorable candy-filled Christmas tree ornaments? Yes ma'am. A cornucopia of season-perfect foil-wrapped chocolates; pre-wrapped "round of four" gift packs featuring four kinds of house made candy; large jars of gianduja, chocolate-hazelnut spread that puts Nutella to shame? What were we talking about again?
1507 Vallejo, SF. (415) 921-8000, www.thecandystoresf.com