stage

Stage listings are compiled by Cheryl Eddy. Performance times may change; call venues to confirm. Reviewers are Robert Avila, Sima Belmar, Rita Felciano, and Brad Rosenstein. See 8 Days a Week for information on how to submit items to the listings.

theater
Opening

Down the Road Noh Space, 2840 Mariposa; 820-1460. Opens Fri/1, 8pm. Runs Fri-Sat and Mon/4, 8pm; Feb 17, 2pm. Through Feb 23. Second Wind Productions presents Lee Blessing's play about a pair of married journalists hired to write a sensationalizing book about a serial killer.

Kiss of the Spider Woman Phoenix Theater, 653 Geary; 642-1257. $10-15. Opens Thurs/31, 8pm. Runs Thurs-Sat, 8pm. Through Feb 23. Bare Bones Theatre Company kicks off its 2002 season with Manuel Puig's play.

Kiss Me Kate Orpheum Theatre, 1192 Market; 512-7770. $34-76. Opens Tues/5, 8pm. Runs Tues-Sat, 8pm (also Wed and Sat-Sun, 2pm). Through March 3. Cole Porter's musical, set backstage at a performance of Taming of the Shrew, comes to town as part of the Best of Broadway series.

Legion New Conservatory Theatre Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972. $18-35. Previews Wed/30-Fri/1, 8pm; Sun/27, 2pm. Opens Sat/2, 8pm. Runs Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun/10, Feb 24, March 10, 24, 31, 2pm. Through April 6. The New Conservatory Theatre Center presents the world premiere of Hal Corley's drama about two married men who suddenly become attracted to each other.

Bay Area

Culture Clash in AmeriCCaBerkeley Repertory Theatre, Roda Theatre, 2015 Addison, Berk; (510) 647-2949. $10-54. Previews Fri/1-Sat/2, Tues/5, 8pm; Sun/3, 7pm. Opens Wed/6, 8pm. Runs Tues and Thurs-Sat, 8pm (also Sat, 2pm); Wed, Sun, 7pm (also Sun, 2pm). Through March 3. The comic trio presents its latest show, created especially for and about Berkeley.

Ongoing

The All Night Strut New Conservatory Theatre Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972. $15-35. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2pm. Through March 3. The New Conservatory Theatre Center continues its In Concert series with this musical celebration of the 1930s and '40s.

The A**hole Monologues Bayfront Theater, Fort Mason Center, Marina at Laguna; 474-8935. $15-50. Thurs/31, 8pm. The Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America benefits from this show "conceived in the spirit of The Vagina Monologues."

'Bay One-Acts Festival' Eureka Theatre, 215 Jackson; 1-866-468-3399, www.ticketweb.com or www.threewisemonkeys.org. Thurs/31-Sat/2, 8pm; Sun/3, 3pm. $15-18. Three Wise Monkeys presents the first annual Bay One-Acts Festival, three separate programs showcasing 13 short plays by local playwrights, each produced by a different Bay Area company. "Program Two" features four pieces that pinpoint the persistence of human affection in a mad world. Clark Morgan's Where Spain Is brings to mind Tarantino and Woody Allen in a story of two intellectually challenged crooks (Geoff Bolt and John Pirruccello) – a hit man and his mark – negotiating a mutually beneficial settlement. Cracked, by Kristine Holland, cleverly explores three troubled characters through the fractured psyche of a precocious psychology student (Catherine Woodman). Lynn Snyder's Air Pockets gives new meaning to the overworked phrase "airline security" and features a fine duet by Sondra Putnam and George McRae as two married strangers on a flight from domesticity and its discontents. Finally, George McKibbens weaves a gritty tale of love, sex, and marriage on minimum wage in Coffee in Michigan. This ambitious and worthwhile series, winding up with "Program Three" this week, compensates for modest production values and an inevitable unevenness with the contagious energy its hybrid formula seems to elicit. (Avila)

The Beard of Avon Geary Theater, 415 Geary; 749-2228. $11-61. Tues-Sat, 8pm (also Wed, Sat-Sun, 2pm). Through Sun/10. Amy Freed's The Beard of Avon makes its local bow at American Conservatory Theater. The play dives headfirst into the knotty "authorship question" behind Shakespeare's plays, asking whether a raw, rhyming lad from Stratford named Will Shakspere could truly have created some of the most immortal literature ever written – or whether he had more than a little help from his friends. Beard is an affectionate satire of the theater, and Matthew Boston's fiercely yearning Will and Marco Barricelli's expertly wry Edward de Vere carry the evening, their negotiations of shared status, personality, and talent informing the play's best scenes. In previous plays, Freed proved an enthusiastic debunker of artistic myths, but she usually did it with more heft and insight than appear here. Particularly with Shakespeare in Love – another comedy that handled the question of how a writer becomes great with much more dramatic acuity – in memory yet green, Beard comes up wanting, a low-cal substitute for the real thing. (Rosenstein)

Copenhagen Curran Theatre, 445 Geary; 512-7770. $34-68. Wed/30-Sat/2, 8pm (also Wed/30, Sat/2-Sun/3, 2pm). Inspired by Werner Heisenberg's famous 1941 journey from Germany, where he was toiling on atomic projects for the Nazis, to see his mentor Niels Bohr in occupied Denmark, Michael Frayn's play delves into the essential question "Why did he come to Copenhagen?" The play brilliantly makes the mystery itself the subject. I watched and listened to Copenhagen with interest and boundless admiration for its rigor, its craft, Frayn's beautifully articulated dialogue and thought, and the production's nearly faultless realization of all of the play's ambitious dimensions. But I never for a moment felt pulled into the evening emotionally, even as Frayn drew insightful parallels between physics and the play's tortured, Hamlet-like patterns of fathers and sons; focused on the pain of ruined friendships and destroyed countries; and compassionately parsed the tug of commitments to family, nation, truth, and conscience. (Rosenstein)

Design for Living Theatre Rhinoceros, 2926 16th St; 861-5079. $15-25. Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 7pm (also Sun/3, Sun/10, 3pm). Through Feb 16. Frivolity seems to be the prevalent theatrical style this New Year, and the ever stylish Noel Coward is once again in perfect tune. Still, Design for Living remains one of his thorniest comedies, a seeming confection that hides razor blades in its froth. Director John Fisher updates the play from 1932 to the present, introduces Coward songs as Greek choruses between scenes, and renders the main characters' bisexual ménage à trois in no uncertain terms. Ironically, this most "shocking" of Coward's comedies winds up seeming tame; all the ass-slapping and nipple-grabbing here seems like a facile reassurance, sexual slapstick that diverts attention from the complicated, difficult relationships at the play's core. Only Doug Holsclaw's flamingly closeted Ernest and Jenny Lord's radiantly edgy Gilda nail both the comedy and painful ambivalence that make the play dangerous and worthwhile. (Rosentstein)

*Don't Make Me Look Too Psychotic Bannam Place Theater, 50 Bannam Place; 986-4607. $15. Thurs-Sat, 8pm. Through March 23. Violently unhealthy relationships are the driving force behind Bruce Pachtman's hilarious solo show, which closed last year after a triumphant 58-week run and is now enjoying a return engagement at the Bannam Place Theater. Pachtman developed this autobiographical piece after dating a particularly incendiary woman. Bruce and Gloria have a lot in common, like drinking problems and intimacy issues. Don't Make Me Look Too Psychotic is gut-bustingly funny, which is no small feat considering the seriousness of the material. (Joshua Medsker)

Euphor!um Bldg 920, Mason St, Presidio (enter from Marina Blvd through the Crissy Field gate); 332-9454. $15. Thurs, 6-10pm; Fri-Sat, 7-11:30pm; Sun, 3-7pm. Extended through Feb 24. Antenna presents its interactive journey through Samuel Taylor Coleridge's opium-inspired poem "Kubla Khan."

Five Flights Thick House, 1695 18th St; 401-8081. $15-20. Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 5pm. Through Feb 24. See "Taking Flight," page 39.

Frank Olivier's Twisted Cabaret and Pandemonium Vaudeville Show Mason Street Theatre, 340 Mason; 982-5463. $30-42. Previews through Feb 14: Thurs, 8pm; Fri, 8:30pm; Sat, 5:30 and 9pm; Sun, 3:30pm. Opens Feb 14, 8pm. Runs Thurs, 8pm; Fri, 8:30pm; Sat, 5:30 and 9pm; Sun, 3:30pm. Open-ended. Performer Frank Olivier presents 15 vignettes of knife-throwing, fire-eating, and other sideshow-style acts with live music.

In Love and Sex Next Stage, 1620 Gough; 673-0304, ext 3. $15-20. Fri-Sat, 8pm. Through Feb 23. See "Taking Flight," page 39.

Jump Exit Theater Cafe, 156 Eddy; 864-4669. $10. Fri/1-Sat/2, 8:30pm. Nena St. Louis performs an autobiographical performance piece.

The Marriage of Bette and Boo Exit on Taylor, 277 Taylor; 648-3091. $12-15. Fri-Sat, 8pm. Through Feb 16. Density over Duration Productions presents Christopher Durang's comedy about marriage and family.

The Mystery of Irma Vep, a Penny Dreadful New Conservatory Theater Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972. $18-35. Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun/3, Sun/10, Feb 17, 2pm. Through Feb 23. Charles Ludlam's comic, gothic farce, presented by the New Conservatory Theatre Center, is a two-actor play filled with multiple characters, zany gags, costumes, and fast-paced action.

Una Noche de Sueños Vidi Flores/A Dream of Flowers A Traveling Jewish Theatre, 470 Florida; 399-1809, www.atjt.com. $12.50-25 (Thurs, pay what you can). Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2 and 7pm. Through Sun/10. A Traveling Jewish Theatre dives into the lush world of Ladino, the swiftly disappearing language of the Spanish Jews in exile. The piece, primarily a work of dance and music, takes as its "text" a cycle of original love songs by Albert Greenberg with lyrics rendered in Ladino (a blend of Spanish, Turkish, Hebrew, Greek, etc.) and English and set to the contemporary rhythms of tangos, sambas, jazz, and electronica. Flores is an admirable attempt to rediscover the seductiveness of this too easily forgotten strand of Jewish roots, and the music-movement form is definitely the right choice for imagining Ladino into the current century. But Greenberg's modern romanceros tell some pretty familiar stories, and neither Helen Stoltzfus's direction nor Sonya Delwaide's colloquial choreography finds much new in these scenarios. (Rosenstein)

*The Search for Signs of Intelligent Life in the Universe Theatre on the Square, 450 Post; 433-9500. $35-50. Wed-Thurs, Feb 19, 8pm; Fri-Sat, 8:30pm; Sat-Sun, 3pm (also Sun, 7:30pm). Extended through Feb 24. Sixteen years after her play's first appearance, Jane Wagner's script still ranks among the most brilliant theater writing of recent decades. Its 13-character universe still crackles with the breadth of its thought, humor, and compassion. Lily Tomlin remains a spot-on powerhouse, etching seamless worlds with the vocal and gestural versatility of a master. (Rosenstein)

Smoker, a Play in 15 Rounds Exit Theater, 156 Eddy; 885-6460. $12-18. Fri-Sat, 8pm. Through Feb 16. From Pass the Hat Presents comes a new play by San Francisco's Michael Mace. The title refers to an unauthorized boxing match fought for small change, but Mace's combatants vie for the love and care of a woman and her unborn child (whose father either of them could be). When Mona disappears, her friend Sol (Joe Weatherby), a blind referee, forces a showdown between estranged husband Charlie (David Tenenbaum), a macho boxer, and longtime lover Mitch (Dave Garrett), a mild veterinarian. The exploration of male identity in a literal and metaphorical boxing ring may seem a familiar conceit, but Mace (whose Triptych ran at the Exit last year) displays his usual flair for dialogue and crafting a good story. Director Laura Ellen Smith elicits nice ensemble playing, though some of the best writing comes in soliloquies performed against running images of classic matches. There's enough here (including live musical accompaniment) to leave us punch drunk, if not KO'd, by the end. (Avila)

Ten Day Soup The Marsh, 1062 Valencia; 826-5750. $10-15. Wed/30-Sun/3, 8pm. Solo performer Charlie Varon presents a play created completely from scratch over a ten-day period with collaborator David Ford.

This Is Our Youth Actors Theater SF, 533 Sutter; 296-9179. $18-25. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 7pm. Through Feb 23. Actors Theatre of San Francisco presents Kenneth Lonergan's play about three young people caught between adolescence and adulthood in 1982 Manhattan.

Bay Area

Every Inch a King La Val's Subterranean Theater, 1834 Euclid, Berk; (510) 558-1381. $8-18 (Thurs, pay what you can). Thurs-Sat, 8pm (also Sat/2, 5pm); Sun, 5pm. Through Sat/9. Central Works performs Gary Graves's comedy about three daughters who must cope with their aging, wealthy father.

Old Money Mountain View Center for the Performing Arts, 600 Castro, Mountain View; (650) 903-6000. $20-40. Tues, 7:30pm (no show Tues/5); Wed-Sat, 8pm (also Sat/2, Sat/9, 2pm); Sun, 2pm (also Sun/3, 7pm). Through Sun/10. In TheatreWorks' production of Wendy Wasserstein's new play, millionaire Jeffrey Bernstein (Peter James Meyers) and son Ovid (Richard Gallagher) are entertaining Manhattan's elite in their newly acquired mansion. On the guest list is Tobias Vivian Pfeiffer III (Ken Ruta), whose robber-baron grandfather once owned the house. Pfeiffer's ailing health induces a time-traveling episode that has two family dramas a century apart mingling in the same room. The play's communion with the society and social satire of old New York never really coheres, despite Robert Kelley's sure direction and Eric E. Sinkkonen's exquisite beaux-arts set. The evening sustains itself on 21st-century witticisms and Mr. Ruta's masterful performance as the timid child of a lost patrimony. (Avila)

Rhinoceros Berkeley Repertory Theatre, Thrust Stage, 2025 Addison, Berk; (510) 647-2949. $16-42. Thurs-Sat, 8pm (also Thurs/31, Sat/2, Sat/9, Feb 14, 23, 28, March 9, 2pm; no show Fri/1); Sun and Wed, 7pm (also Sun, 2pm). Through March 10. Eugène Ionesco's most famous play gets a major remounting at Berkeley Rep. You'd think this absurdist diatribe against conformity would be remarkably resonant in a time when the herd mentality seems to rule, but unfortunately this production, employing a bland translation-adaptation of the play by Allen Kuharski and Georges Moskos, never takes off. A stellar cast including Margaret Schenck, Wilma Bonet, Warren Keith, W. Francis Walters, and Susan Marie Brecht goes largely wasted here, as does, amazingly, Geoff Hoyle in the central role of Berenger. Hoyle finds a few moments of delicious physical comedy, but usually acute director Barbara Damashek doesn't seem to have found a striking point for him or, for that matter, for the play itself. Jarion Monroe does the finest work as the rhinocerotic Jean, Gerald Hiken is a bright spot in multiple roles, and Christopher Barreca's tumescent horn of a set and Beaver Bauer's ooh-la-la French costumes are visual pleasures. To be fair, the Rep was without electrical power for its preview week and lost vital production time, but something far more essential than that seems to be missing here. (Rosenstein)

Three Sisters Live Oak Theatre, 1301 Shattuck, Berk; (510) 528-5620. $10. Fri-Sat, 8pm (also Feb 14, 8pm). Through Feb 16. Actors Ensemble of Berkeley performs David Mamet's adaptation of the Chekhov play.

*The Trestle at Pope Lick Creek Aurora Theatre, 2081 Addison, Berk; (510) 843-4822, www.auroratheatre.org. $26-35. Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2 and 7pm. Through Sun/10. Playwright Naomi Wallace manages to take a situation ripe with potential cliché and transform it into a haunting, original drama. Two teenagers in a depression-era town have little to look forward to but the challenge of playing chicken with an express train that regularly passes them by. The play loses some of its juice in a diffuse second act, but for most of its length this is a wonderfully rich and harrowing exploration of youth, sex, and the failed promise of American dreams. Under Søren Oliver's finely measured direction the entire ensemble is excellent, including two knockout performances by Jennifer Wagner and Ian Scott McGregor Jurcso as the two young leads. (Rosenstein)

dance

'Cavewomen 2002' Dance Mission Theatre, 3316 24th St; 273-4633. Fri-Sat, 8pm (also Thurs, 8pm); Sun, 6pm. $17-20. In many ways Cavewomen is a throwback to the glory days of Dance Brigade's road-blasting '80s work, feminist multimedia theater propelled by three Ps: passion, performance, and politics. Krissy Keefer is now working with a new generation of dancers, but they are as gutsy as her earlier cohorts, if not gutsier. You don't have to believe in the efficacy of advocacy art or Cavewomen's rather simplistic perspectives on power and patriarchy – these women put on a hell of a show. (Felciano)

Robert Moses' Kin Cowell Theater, Fort Mason Center, Marina at Laguna; 345-7575. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2 and 7pm. Through Feb 17. $15-22.50. The company performs Word of Mouth, an evening-length work about the importance of oral tradition in African American communities.

'San Francisco Ballet 69th Repertory Season Opening Night Gala' War Memorial Opera House, 301 Van Ness; 865-2000. Wed, 8pm. $25-250. The company performs 10 different classical and contemporary works.

'San Francisco Ballet 2002 Repertory Season' War Memorial Opera House, 301 Van Ness; 865-2000. Program One: Tues/5, Fri/8, Feb 14, 16, 8pm (also Feb 16, 2pm); Wed/6, 7:30pm. $10-120. Program One is the "All Robbins Program," featuring Fanfare, Dances at a Gathering, and Glass Pieces.

Stephen Petronio Company Yerba Buena Center for the Arts Theater, 700 Howard; 392-4400. Thurs-Sat, 8pm (also Sat-Sun, 2pm). $6-35. See Critic's Choice.

'Undressed and Adrift' Jon Sims Center for the Arts, 1519 Mission; 554-0402. Fri, 8pm. $5-10 (no one turned away for lack of funds). Choreographer Eric Kupers and dancer-collaborators Deborah Anderson, Manuelito Biag, Hilary Bryan, Dawn Frank, Kristin Heavey, Debby Kajiyama, Edmer Lazaro, Anne-Lise Reusswig, Frankie Sadarling, Stacz Sadowski, Manfred Schaectle, Nol Simonse, Oscar Trujillo, and Irene Yung embark on the first showing of their AIRspace residency at Jon Sims.

Bay Area

Kun Shin Dancers Calvin Simmons Theatre, Henry J. Kaiser Convention Center, 10 10th St, Oakl; (510) 465-9312. Thurs, 10:30am and 12:30pm. $8-10. Dance for Power presents this performance of folk dances from China and Taiwan.

Merce Cunningham Dance Company UC Berkeley, Zellerbach Hall, Bancroft at Telegraph, Berk; (510) 642-9988. Fri-Sat, 8pm. $24-46. Friday, the company performs an untitled world premiere, plus Interscape (2000); Saturday, the untitled program includes the world premiere, plus Native Green (1985) Pond Way (1998).

performance

'Ascension – A Celebration of Electronic Music, Art, and Dance Culture' Ten 15 Folsom, 1015 Folsom; (310) 460-5254. Thurs, 8pm-2:30am. Call for price. Infinite Kaos presents a night of DJs, visual and performing artists, and dancers.

'Coconut Masquerade' Bindlestiff Studio, 185 Sixth St; 974-1167. Mon, 7:30pm. Free. Bindlestiff Studio presents a new play by emerging playwright Melinda Corazon Foley.

Flash Family Blue Bear Theater, Fort Mason Center, Bldg D, Second fl, Marina at Laguna; 885-5678. Sat, 8:30pm. Through Sat/9. $7-14. The long-running improv theater company performs.

'Killing My Lobster Guilty as Sin' Brava Theater Center, 2789 24th St; 267-0642, www.killingmylobster.com. Fri-Sun, 8pm. Through Sun/10. $10-15. See 8 Days a Week, page 44.

'New York Loves America: The Broadway Tour' Metreon, 101 Fourth St; www.metreon.com. Wed, noon. Free. Sandy Duncan stars in a Broadway musical review.

'One Man Band Night' Odeon Bar, 3223 Mission; 648-8627. Thurs, 9pm. Call for price. This week's performer is Suzanne "Kitten on the Keys" Ramsey.

'Pigmeat Markham, Thanks for Everything ... Spike Lee' Spanganga, 3376 19th St; 821-1102. Fri-Sat, 8pm. Through Sat/9. $12. Sketch comedy and improv theater group Oui Be Negroes performs its latest show.

'Poets Theater Jubilee' New Langton Arts, 1246 Folsom; 626-5416. Fri, 7:30pm. $5. Three one-act plays by Carla Harryman and David Larsen, plus an additional short. A panel discussion (Sat, 8pm, $4-6) on the history and theory of poets theater with Norma Cole, Carla Harryman, Mac McGinnes, Nick Robinson, Leslie Scalapino, and moderators Kevin Killian and Camille Roy.

'Queer as FUNK' Jon Sims Center for the Arts, 1519 Mission; 554-0402. Sat, 8pm. $5-10. SFinX: San Francisco in Exile presents a spoken word performance with Karen Ripley, Sonia Whittle, Karen Ladson, Lucky 7, and Deep Dickollective.

'We Carry a Home with Us: Post Immigrant Reflections' Galeria de la Raza, 2857 24th St; 826-8009. Sat, 8pm. Call for price. (Also Mon, UC Berkeley, Edelmann Building, Seventh fl, Berk; 510-384-3922). La Peña Cultural Center artist in residence Elia Arve heads up a group of Latino spoken word and performance artists (including Paul Flores, Leticia Hernandez, Jime Salcedo-Malo, and more) in a show that addresses Latino immigrant issues.

'Women on the Way Festival' Venue 9, 252 Ninth St; 289-2000, wwwvenue9.com. Thurs-Sun, 8pm. $15. This week: Thurs,

World Affairs, by Daughters of Yam, Opal Palmer Adisa, and Devorah Major; Nothing Is Sacred, by Erica Sodos; Fri, Date Me, by Eleanor Scott; Dance Repertory/San Francisco and special guest Huckabay McAllister Dance; Sat, The Things I've Done for Love, by Cathy Roy; World Affairs; Dance Repertory/San Francisco and special guest Huckabay McAllister Dance; Sun, The Things I've Done for Love; How to Be a Secret Agent Girl as Seen on American Television and in the Movies, by Cathleen Daly.

Bay Area

'11th Annual African American Celebration Through Poetry' Oakland Public Library, West Oakland Branch, 1801 Adeline, Oakl; (510) 238-7352. Sat, 1-4pm. Free. Drummers, dancers, jazz musicians, and poets are invited to take part in this event.

'James Joyce, Marcel Duchamp, Erik Satie: An Alphabet' UC Berkeley, Zellerbach Hall, Bancroft at Telegraph, Berk; (510) 642-9988. Tues, 8pm. $20-42. An ensemble of actors, including dancer Merce Cunningham, stage John Cage's 1982 radio play.

'John Henry' and 'The Gilded Six Bits' Julia Morgan Center for the Arts, 2640 College, Berk; (925) 798-1300. Fri, 7pm; Sat, 5pm; Sun, 2pm. $11-16. Word for Word performs plays by Julius Lester and Zora Neale Hurston in honor of Black History Month.

Peking Acrobats Marin Center, 10 Avenue of the Flags, San Rafael; (415) 472-3500. Sat, 8pm. $16-28. The 26-member troupe includes tumblers, contortionists, jugglers, gymnasts, and musicians.

'The Worst of Eric Bogosian' Osher Marin Jewish Community Center, 200 N. San Pedro, San Rafael; (415) 479-2000. Sun, 5pm; Mon, 7:30pm. Call for price. The actor-writer performs his solo show.

comedy

Bayfront Theater Building B, Third fl, Fort Mason Center, Marina at Laguna; 474-8935. Fri, 8pm: "Spontaneous Broadway," $12. Sat, 8pm: "Theatresports All-Stars," $12. Sun, 8pm: "Micetro," $6.

Marsh 1062 Valencia; 826-5750. Sat, 9pm: All-female comedy showcase, 9pm, $7.

Spanganga 3376 19th St; 821-1102. Thurs, 10pm: "Spiegelmania," stand-up comedy show hosted by Mike Spiegelman, $5. Sat, 10pm: "Ha Bloody Ha," comedy and variety show hosted by Harmon Leon, $7.

Stud Bar 399 Ninth St; 250-2009. Wed, 7pm: "Stood Up!," stand-up show hosted by Pippi Lovestocking, $5.

'They Call Me Shitshoes' Spanganga, 3376 19th St; 821-1102. Fri, 10pm. Through Feb 22. $10. Prankster and comedian Harmon Leon performs in a solo show inspired by his real-life experiences as a ventriloquist, birthday-party clown, and more.

Warfield 982 Market; 421-TIXS. Sat, 8pm: "Wild 94.9 Doghouse Comedy Blitz," with Willie Barcena, David Alan Grier, Gabriel Iglesias, Cain Lopez, and Guy Torry, $29.50-33.50.

Bay Area

Black Box 1928 Telegraph, Oakl; (510) 595-5597. Thurs, 8pm: The Oakland Playhouse Improv Troupe performs improv comedy, $5.

Blakes 2367 Telegraph, Berk; (510) 848-0886. Tues, 9:30pm: "Heuristic Squelch Comedy Night," with Andrew Norelli and friends, $8.

spoken word

Open mics take place almost every night in cafés throughout the Bay Area. If you want to perform, show up about half an hour before start time to put your name on the list. A day-by-day guide to word events and featured readers:

Wednesday: City Lights 261 Columbus; 362-8193. Poets from Swan Scythe and Momotombo Press read their works, 7pm, free. Brainwash Cafe 1126 Folsom; 864-3842. "Spoken Word Salon," with host Diamond Dave Whitaker, 8pm, free. La Peña Cultural Center 3105 Shattuck, Berk; (510) 849-2572. "Cafe Poetry," open mic with host Rain, 7:30pm, $2. Cody's Books 2454 Telegraph, Berk; (510) 845-7852. "Poetry Flash," with Ralph Angel and George Higgins, 7:30pm, $2.

Thursday: San Francisco Women's Building 3543 18th St; 334-1502, ext 301. "Slam for Choice," sponsored by the California Abortion and Reproductive Rights Action League (CARAL), 7:30pm, $5-17.

Friday: Yakety Yak Coffee House 679 Sutter; 285-2951. Open mic and featured readers Claire Light and April Martin Chartrand, 7:30pm, free. Escape from New York Pizza 333 Bush; www.poetryandpizza.homestead.com. "Poetry and Pizza" presents Katherine Harer and Kathleen de Azevedo reading to benefit Doctors Without Borders, 7:30pm, $5. Harvey Milk Center 50 Scott; 337-4713. "Open Mic Lab" for performers of all types, 8-10pm, free.

Saturday: Coffee with a Beat 458 Perkins, Oakl; (510) 526-5985. "Word Beat Reading Series," with featured readers Julia Vinograd and Shauna Rogan, plus open mic, 7-9pm, free. Berkeley Public Library, South Branch, 1901 Russell; (510) 527-9905. The Bay Area Poets Coalition presents the winners of its annual poetry contest, plus open mic, 3-5pm, free.

Sunday: Black Box 1928 Telegraph, Oakl; (510) 451-1932. "Sheslam" poetry slam, 7:30pm, $5.