ARNOLD FROM THE Terminator and Arnold from Diff'rent Strokes aren't the only political newbies to grace California's recall ballot. Several less-prominent gubernatorial candidates hailing from the Bay Area also take their first dive into mainstream politics. And while they may lack Schwarzenegger's cash and celebrity status, many have laid out political platforms that are far more compelling than the muscleman's vague platitudes. Here are a half dozen local also-rans that may interest Bay Guardian readers:

Robert Cullenbine (Palo Alto) Ask Bob Cullenbine why you should vote for him and he'll tell you, "Don't! I'm corrupt and completely unqualified." A retired businessman who works as a full-time volunteer at the Family Giving Tree organization, 65-year-old Cullenbine tells the Bay Guardian, "Don't vote for me. I just ran to emphasize that the recall is a horrible law. Any idiot like me can run."

If only all idiots could be so self-reflective. Cullenbine's campaign focuses on exposing what he characterizes as a right-wing takeover of the United States that's reminiscent of the rise of fascism before World War II. Just returned from a trip to Nuremberg, Cullenbine says, "I used to think that it could never happen in the U.S., but today I believe that it can. The erosion of the Bill of Rights, the attacks on homosexuals, the forced patriotism of anyone who disagrees – these are the same things they used to have in Nazi Germany."

Calling the recall symptomatic of the right-wing extremism that's devastating the country, Cullenbine continues, "I don't know more than anyone else. I'm just a moron who had $3,500 to pay for the candidate fees. But now I've got people like [the Bay Guardian] calling me. Just goes to show how starved we are for real news." www.bobcan.com.

Rich Gosse (San Raphael) Rich Gosse serves as chair of American Singles, the world's largest nonprofit organization for single adults, from whence he derives his platform: "Fairness for Singles." Gosse wants to politicize the category "single" and end discrimination against the unmarried.

He said his research and that of the American Association of Single People demonstrate single people pay more in taxes and insurance premiums and are ultimately paid less than their married counterparts once you factor in pensions, housing costs, employee benefits, and unemployment compensation.

"We must change policy to equalize single and married [rights and benefits]," Gosse tells us. While he would first like to examine the results in Vermont, the first state to legalize gay marriage, before taking a position on similar legislation in California, Gosse says his singles policy would be inclusive of lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer domestic partners.

Finally, a man who takes relationships seriously. www.richgosse.com.

Garrett Gruener (San Francisco) Considering Garrett Gruener is the father of the search engine Ask Jeeves, suffice it to say that the Terminator isn't the only candidate this year who's equipped to take on the machines.

Summarizing his platform for us as "new jobs from new enterprises," Gruener focuses on the creation of new jobs from a fusion of developments in technology, education, and environmental protection. His plan to reinvigorate the state's education system includes providing laptop computers for all 7th through 12th grade students and creating a core software curriculum, which he says will also revamp the disillusioned dot-com industry.

Gruener proposes new jobs in green technology that will boost California's investment in renewable energies. And although he's honest about making a pretty penny from his dot-com work, he proposes raising tax rates on the state's highest income bracket to 11 percent. Maybe the original "Ask Jeeves" does have all the answers. www.gruenerforgovernor.com.

Paul Mariano (Martinez) Crossing over into state political office wouldn't be that far of a move for Paul Mariano, who works as a public defender in Contra Costa County. But then again, he doesn't actually want to do the job he's running for.

Mariano tells us, "The only way to retain Davis as governor is to vote for me." If elected, Mariano says that he'll accept the title, but then appoint Gray Davis as his chief of staff and let him continue to run the state. www.paulmarianoforgovernor.com.

Georgy Russell (Mountain View) By now, software engineer Georgy Russell's campaign merchandising strategy has made news everywhere from Washington, D.C., to Germany. Infamous for selling "Georgy for Governor" thong underwear, Russell recently gave a speech at UC Berkeley in which she shared the lesson "A little thong goes a long way!"

But beneath the thonged exterior lies a progressive political platform that includes campaign-finance reform, clean energy, and new criminal justice policy that would end the death penalty and Three Strikes and give leniency to battered women who attack their abusers. If that's not enough, Russell wants to implement universal health care, gay marriage, and the legalization of marijuana. Looks like it's more than underwear that's got lefties going gah-gah for Georgy. www.georgyforgov.com.

Daniel Watts (San Jose) This 21-year-old UC San Diego student touts three semesters on the student council at Blossom Valley Elementary as the bulk of his political experience. Nonetheless, Watts is running for governor under a single-issue platform of lowering fees for all students at California's public universities and junior colleges.

Watts might be young, but he's not delusional. "People should look at my candidacy as a referendum," Watts tells us. "People who'll vote for me don't want me to be governor; they'll vote for me to make a statement."