FILM CRITICS AROUND the nation have greeted Quentin Tarantino's Kill Bill: Volume One with praise for its Asian-derived style and action and with damnation for its "film geek" indulgences. Both opinions are valid, until some of these critics try to show off their knowledge of Asian film. Then things get messier than the Bride's bloody siege on the House of Blue Leaves. Like when New Times (and consequently, SF Weekly) critic Robert Wilonsky refers to Bill's "campy title credits ... which inform us the movie's been shot in 'ShawVision.'" Problem is, the giant letters on the screen, the same ones that have sent shivers down the spines of kung fu movie fans for decades, actually read "Shaw Scope" (and, to geek out further, Kill Bill was shot in Super 35mm). Wilonsky goes on to assert the character of Japanese sword master Hattori Hanzo is "played by Shaw Brothers immortal Sonny Chiba." Trouble is, the Japan-born Chiba, while immortal for sure, has never made a film for the Hong Kong-based Shaws. Then there's the San Francisco Chronicle's Mick LaSalle, who describes Go Go Yubari (played by Chiaki Kuriyama) as "a 17-year-old in a Catholic school uniform." Actually, Go Go is wearing a Japanese school girl uniform and there's nothing religious about it. The outfit is meant to invoke Kuriyama's performance as a killer ko-gal in Battle Royale (2000), the biggest cult film to ever emerge from Japan. And no, you don't have to join a cult to see it. The VCD goes for six bucks in Chinatown. All this nit-picking may sound petty, but in a film like Kill Bill, reference is all there is. Faking an intimate knowledge of "trash films" to praise or condemn Kill Bill is not cool, especially when there's a world full of film geeks who could give you an educated opinion. Perhaps they should be recruited by the nation's press to review next year's Kill Bill: Volume Two, while all erroneous film critics are sent to ninja training camp (preferably the one seen in Larry Hutton's 1988 City Ninja).