As You Like It Curran Theatre, 445 Geary; 512-7770, www.ticketmaster.com. $40-72. Opens Tues/5, 8pm. Runs Tues-Sat, 8pm (also Wed and Sat, 2pm); Sun, 2pm. Through May 1. Sir Peter Hall's production of the Shakespeare comedy comes to San Francisco as part of the Best of Broadway series.

Beautiful Child Theatre Rhinoceros, 2926 16th St; 861-5079, www.therhino.org. $15-28. Previews Thurs/31-Fri/1, 8pm. Opens Sat/2, 8pm. Runs Wed-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 3 and 7pm (no 3pm show Sun/3). Through April 24. Theatre Rhinoceros performs Nicky Silver's dark comedy about a married couple grappling with the fact that their son, an art teacher, has fallen in love with one of his students.

The Blue Dress New Conservatory Theatre Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972, www.nctcsf.org. $15-20. Previews Thurs/31-Sat/2, 8pm. Opens Sun/3, 3pm. Runs Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2pm. Through April 17. Bruce Bierman performs his autobiographical solo comedy about his unwitting childhood participation in a government-funded study on "sissyboys" in the 1970s.

Falsettos Phoenix Theater, 414 Mason, Ste 601; (650) 755-2336, red-dragon-productions@hotmail.com. $17-22. Opens Fri/1, 8pm. Runs Fri-Sat and April 14, 8pm; Sun, 2pm (also April 17, 7pm). Through April 17. Red Dragon Productions performs William Finn's musical about a 1980s family dealing with AIDS.

Minnie's Boys Eureka Theatre, 215 Jackson; 978-2787, www.42ndStMoon.org. $17-30. Previews Wed/30-Fri/1, 8pm. Opens Sat/2, 6pm. Runs Thurs-Fri, 8pm; Sat, 6pm (also April 9, 1pm); Sun, 3pm; April 13, 7pm. Through April 17. "Lost musicals" company 42nd Street Moon performs this comedy about the early years of the Marx brothers, with a book cowritten by Groucho Marx's son, Arthur.

The Shooting Stage New Conservatory Theatre Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972, www.nctcsf.org. $20-40. Previews Fri/1-Sat/2 and April 6-8, 8pm. Opens April 9, 8pm. Runs Wed-Sat, 8pm; starting April 17, also runs Sun, 2pm. Through May 8. The New Conservatory Theatre Center's Pride Season Ten continues with Michael Lewis MacLennan's drama about an artist's obscenity trial.

Temptation Off-Market Theater, 965 Mission; 262-0477, www.custommade.org. $10-30. Previews Fri/1, 8pm. Opens Sat/2, 8pm. Runs Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 3pm. Through April 17. Custom Made Theatre Company performs Vaclav Havel's 1985 absurdist spin on the Faust story.

Bay Area

Ariel Berkeley City Club, 2315 Durant, Berk; (510) 644-9940, www.wildeirish.org. $18-25. Previews Fri/1, 8pm. Opens Sat/2, 8pm. Runs Thurs-Sat and April 11, 8pm; Sun, 3pm. Through May 1. Wilde Irish Productions performs the U.S. premiere of Marina Carr's drama, which sets the Greek myth of Iphigenia in modern-day Ireland.

Ongoing

Beyond Therapy Shelton Theater, 533 Sutter; 433-1226, www.jeanshelton.com. $20-25. Thurs-Sat, 8pm. Open-ended. The Shelton Theater brings back Christopher Durang's comedy about therapists and their patients.

Blood Relative Traveling Jewish Theatre, 470 Florida; 285-8080, www.atjt.com. $12-35. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2 and 7pm. Through April 17. Also runs at Julia Morgan Center for the Arts, 2640 College, Berk. Same price and phone. Opens April 21, 8pm. Runs Thurs-Sat, 8pm (no show April 23); Sun, 2 and 7pm; April 27, 2pm. Through May 1. Traveling Jewish Theatre performs a collaboratively created work (formerly known as The Middle East Project) about a character with a Jewish mother and a Muslim father living in Israel and Palestine.

Blue Lorraine Hansberry Theatre, 620 Sutter; 474-8800, www.lhtsf.com. $25-32. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 2pm. Through April 17. Lorraine Hansberry Theatre performs Charles Randolph Wright's play about the South Carolina family of an acclaimed jazz singer.

Crash Course: Cooking, Juggling, and Getting Hurt Climate Theater, 285 Ninth St; 871-9699, www.crashcourseshow.com. $15. Fri-Sun, 8pm. Through June 26. Juggler Scot Nery hosts a comedy cooking show, with weekly themes, recipes, and guests.

Crimes of the Heart Actors Theatre of San Francisco, 533 Sutter; 296-9179, www.ticketweb.com, www.actorstheatresf.org. $10-40. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 7pm. Through April 23. Actors Theatre of San Francisco performs Beth Henley's dark comedy about a trio of conflicted sisters.

Evita Golden Gate Theatre, One Taylor; 512-7770, www.ticketmaster.com. $35-85. Tues-Sat, 8pm (also Wed and Sat, 2pm); Sun, 2pm. Through April 10. Composer Andrew Lloyd Webber and lyricist Tim Rice got famous and, eventually, knighted by the Queen of England for musicals like this one based on the life of Argentina's Eva Peron, and featuring, rather ridiculously, Che Guevara as its unlikely narrator. Particular service may have been rendered Her Majesty's government in this case (who knows?) since my almanac says the Falklands War began a mere four years after Evita's 1978 London premiere. Coincidence? Or disinformation campaign extraordinaire? Webber and Rice, the Judith Millers of their day? To some this will sound as far-fetched as their vaunted reputation for musical theater, but if you go for Cats or Jesus Christ Superstar, or just ennui-induced conspiracy theories, you won't care. Instead you'll probably enjoy Hal Prince's retooled production, brought to you by Best of Broadway. The rest have been warned. (Avila)

*Female Transport and Lilies Zeum Theater, Yerba Buena Gardens, Fourth St at Howard; 749-2228, www.act-sf.org. $12-25. Female Transport: Fri/1 and Sun/3, 8pm; Sat/2, 2pm. Lilies: Wed/30-Thurs/31 and Sat/2, 8pm; Fri/1, 2pm. Female Transport: Set on a convict ship in 1807, Female Transport captures the experiences of six women who, like it or not, are on their way to Australia, where they will serve out their terms in forced labor. Chances are slim, we learn early on, that all of them will survive the six-month journey in the dank belly of a rickety old "tub," as the belligerent Nance (Gwynne Flanagan) repeatedly calls it. The captain's budget doesn't accommodate for adequate nutrition and medical care. Under such conditions, survival for the prisoners (mostly prostitutes and con artists) immediately becomes a game of forming alliances and asserting dominance. Members of ACT's Master of Fine Arts Program specifically chose this play to forge parallels with Lilies, the other student production in rep. It's a demanding study in the psychology of confinement in which the women players never get to leave the stage (unless their jailers, played by Steven Anthony Jones and Jomar Tagatac, have hauled them off for a beating). We're spared no detail of their experience, as we watch them fight, fuck, vomit, curse, pee, and very slowly learn the key to staying alive. As long as the performers maintain focus, this journey is an engaging one. (Giattina) Lilies: ACT's Master of Fine Arts Program and Theatre Rhinoceros present Quebecois playwright Michel Marc Bouchard's love story about two boys at a Quebec Catholic school in 1912, whose romance plays out against a backdrop of intolerance and cruelty. In the work's play within a play, the prisoners of a Quebec penitentiary in 1952 act out the story of young Simon (Steven Strobel) and Vallier (Clayton B. Hodges) for a captive audience of one, a certain Bishop Bilodeau (Tim Hendrixson), an old schoolmate of now-inmate Simon (Steve Irish) who must watch his sniveling and puritanical younger self (Andy Butterfield) repeat the actions that precipitated tragedy years before. Meanwhile, the convicts (dwarfed by a wall of steel bars and costumed in ingeniously refashioned prison garb) create a slightly surreal version of the 1912 town, with its bigots and eccentrics, including Vallier's charmingly not-all-there mother, the deeply theatrical Countess Marie-Laure de Tilly (Gregory Wallace). Bouchard's darkly whimsical play begins strong but seems to lose its way near the end, veering into some banal dialogue and ending on a not entirely convincing note. Until then, director Serge Denoncourt's strong cast and dynamic staging make this worthwhile production something of a fevered dream. (Avila)

F.O.B. (Fresh off the Boat) and F.O.P. (Fresh off the Plane) Magic Theatre, Fort Mason Center, Bldg D, Marina at Laguna; www.asianamericantheater.org. $12.50-25. F.O.B.: Thurs-Sat, 7pm; Sun, 5pm. F.O.P.: Thurs-Sat, 9pm; Sun, 7pm. Through April 10. Asian American Theater Company performs plays by David Henry Hwang and Sean Lim.

Guantanamo: Bound to Defend Freedom Brava Theater Center, 2789 24th St; 647-2822, www.brava.org. $20-65. Wed-Sun, 8pm (also Sun, 3pm). Through April 24. Brava! For Women in the Arts performs Victoria Britain and Gillian Slovo's play, based on verbatim testimonies from Guantanamo detainees, lawyers, politicians, and detainees' family members.

I Look Like an Egg, but I Identify As a Cookie Hotel Rex, 552 Sutter; 1-800-838-3006, www.subvert.com. $10-50. Extended run: Sun-Mon, 8pm. Through April 25. Heather Gold revives her solo show, an "interactive baking comedy."

Miss Coco Peru Is Undaunted! New Conservatory Theatre Center, 25 Van Ness; 861-8972, www.nctcsf.org. $20-30. Wed/30-Sat/2, 8pm; Sun/3, 2pm. Drag luminary Miss Coco Peru performs her autobiographical cabaret show.

*Not a Genuine Black Man Marsh, 1062 Valencia; 826-5750. $15-22. Extended run: Thurs-Fri, 8:30pm; Sat, 5pm. Through April 30. What, the unapologetically middle-class Brian Copeland asks, is the real meaning behind the phrase "a genuine black man"? By way of an answer, the stand-up comic and KGO radio host offers up a simultaneously funny and disarmingly frank story about growing up African American in the racist suburb that was San Leandro in the early 1970s. Letting his narrative bounce back and forth between his boyhood memories and a period of depression that overtook him as a parent in 1999 – and interlarding the autobiography with verbatim utterances from both sides of the fight his family joined to desegregate the city – Copeland brings admirable chops as a comedian to bear on some difficult and disturbing, if ultimately hopeful, material. (Avila)

One Big Lie Exit Theatre, 156 Eddy; 675-5995, www.crowdedfire.org. $15-25. Thurs-Sat and April 11, 8pm. Through April 16. Crowded Fire Theater Company and the Playwrights Foundation perform the world premiere of Liz Duffy Adams's musical fable.

*Rush Limbaugh in Night School Marsh, 1062 Valencia; 826-5750, www.themarsh.org. $15-22. Extended run: Sat, 8pm (no show April 9); Sun, 7pm. Through April 17. Picture this: it's 1998, President Bill Clinton's facing impeachment for horsing around without the consent of Congress, and Rush Limbaugh is on top of the world, as well as on top of the ratings charts, at the very peak of his celebrity. All of a sudden a Cuban American with a righter-than-thou radio slot in Miami gets Rush nervous enough to enroll incognito in an evening Spanish class at the New School for Social Research. In that classroom, Limbaugh (alias Russell Lindbergh) will fall in love with a baby-boomer massage therapist with a secret of her own. First birthed at the Marsh in 1994 to great multiple run-extending applause, Rush Limbaugh in Night School is back, and it's still some of the sharpest satire around. (Avila)

*The Typographer's Dream Thick House, 1695 18th St; 821-4849, www.encoretheatrecompany.org. $15-20. Extended run: Thurs/31-Sat/2, 8pm (also Sat/2, 5pm); Sun/3, 1 and 5pm. A typographer (Aimée Guillot), a geographer (Jamie Jones), and a stenographer (Michael Shipley) sit at a long table facing the audience, career-day style, and proceed to talk about what they do. And maybe that's all you need to know. Except that what sounds like something designed to bore the living shit out of you is actually one of the more entertaining, unpredictable, and intriguing pieces of theater around. This playfully deadpan premise winds up three distinct personalities and unravels the monuments to self each has so lovingly, thoughtfully, obsessively constructed. But are they monuments, or are they sarcophagi? Or are they individual wormholes out of an entirely alienating universe and back in again through the side door? Featuring a sharp and very amusing cast, and wonderfully staged by director Anne Kauffman, Encore Theater presents the West Coast premiere of the latest play from former local guy Adam Bock (Five Flights, Thursday), one that actually puts some mirth into the term job fair. (Avila)

V the Ultimate Variety Show V Theater, Pier 39; 39-VSHOW, www.vtheshow.com. $24-44. Nightly, 6 and 8pm. Ongoing. A revolving array of variety acts highlight this family-friendly show originally produced in Las Vegas.

*The Voysey Inheritance Geary Theater, 415 Geary; 749-2228, www.act-sf.org. $11-68. Wed/30-Sat/2, April 4-9, and 12-16, 8pm (also Wed/30, Sat/2, April 9, 13, and 16, 2pm); Sun/3 and April 10, 2pm (also April 10, 7pm); April 17, 7pm. Through April 17. Grandfather's portrait beams approvingly from the wall over the mantelpiece as solicitor-patriarch Mr. Voysey (Ken Ruta) explains to his incredulous son and business partner Edward (Anthony Fusco) that the family's posh lifestyle has been built entirely on the systematic defrauding of the family firm's trusting clientele. In fact, it's something of a tradition at this point, and the lump of Edward's problematic "inheritance" in David Mamet's trim reworking of Harley Granville-Barker's 1905 comedy of middle-class hypocrisy, receiving its lavish world premiere in an American Conservatory Theater-Kansas City Repertory Theater coproduction gracefully helmed by ACT artistic director Carey Perloff. Edward's attempt to right the family's wrongs and bring it into honorable standing after his father's death (an Edwardian version of Michael Corleone, you might say) occupies the rest of the play, his plan inevitably ruffling the feathers of an amusing houseful of siblings and associates, while pointing up the thornier contradictions in his situation. Interestingly, for all his unbending rectitude, Edward seems (at least initially) like a candle that's already gone out, remote and vaguely forbidding, while his unscrupulous father is vitality and gregariousness himself. Family friend and pillaged client Mr. Booth (Gary Neal Johnson) underscores the point in his ironic preference for the older man as a reassuring paragon of manly virtues – this is a world at base so little removed from the days of outright piracy that its mores almost require a certain "buccaneer" spirit, even if the ethics of the buccaneer can't be far behind. (Avila)

Bay Area

For Better or Worse Berkeley Repertory Theatre's Thrust Stage, 2025 Addison, Berk; (510) 647-2949, www.berkeleyrep.org. $20-55. Tues, Thurs-Sat, 8pm (also Sat and Thurs, 2pm; but no 2pm shows Thurs/31 or April 14); Wed and Sun, 7pm (also Sun, 2pm). Through April 24. "He's one of the funniest men in the world," I overheard a woman say pre-show about Geoff Hoyle, a former clown who trained with Marcel Marceau's teacher. Hoyle's For Better or Worse, culled from comedic plays by Georges Feydeau and directed by David Ira Goldstein, is a slapstick romp set in Paris before the Great War. It delves into the absurd marital life of Bastien Follavoine (Hoyle) and Julie Follavoine (Sharon Lockwood), beginning with the impending birth of their son Toto. Bastien, who makes chamber pots for a living, is more of a hindrance than a help to Julie, who's eager for the arrival of their baby, whom we later see as a petulant seven-year-old who refuses to take his medicine. Interspersed with the domestic scenes, Hoyle takes to the stage posing as a university professor, hamming it up with audience participation and faux theater donor stories, putting his loyal fans in stitches. (Mantzaris)

*The Just Ashby Stage, 1901 Ashby, Berk; (510) 841-6500, www.shotgunplayers.org. $10-30. Thurs-Sun, 8pm. Through April 10. Shotgun Players' production of Albert Camus's 1949 play The Just (Les justes) proves to be a still relevant and dramatically engaging examination of terrorism, grounded in the mind-set and motives of a historical group of Russian socialist revolutionaries who assassinated a prominent czarist official in 1905. Though today "terrorism" usually connotes the deliberate murder of civilians for political ends, as employed by the play's characters, it means the targeted assassination of political figures. Grand Duke Sergei, the revolutionaries' victim, is a representative of a brutal system of oppression and therefore considered a legitimate target. Yet, as an encounter between revolutionary Yanek (Taylor Valentine) and the duke's widow (Michele Shoshani) suggests, the taking of any life is no small matter. Camus is interested in the psychology of these idealists driven to murder and suicide for the cause of a bright future – but also in the relationship between means and ends in the legitimate revolt against tyranny. These themes are brought out with dramatic flair in Tom Hoover's lucid new translation and the bold but finely tuned performances directed by Patrick Dooley. (Avila)

Vincent in Brixton Lucie Stern Theatre, 1305 Middlefield, Palo Alto; (650) 903-6000, www.theatreworks.org. $20-50. Wed/30-Sat/2, 8pm; Sun/3, 2pm. TheatreWorks performs Nicholas Wright's new drama about a young Vincent Van Gogh.

dance

Paul Taylor Dance Company Yerba Buena Center for the Arts Theater, 700 Howard; 392-2545, www.performances.org. Program A: Sat/2, 8pm; Sun/3, 7pm; April 8, 8pm. Program B: April 6 and 9, 8pm. Program C: April 7, 8pm; April 10, 2pm. Family matinee I: Sun/3, 2pm; Family matinee II: April 9, 2pm. $35-52. See Critic's Choice.

San Francisco Ballet War Memorial Opera House, 301 Van Ness; 865-2000, www.sfballet.org. Program Six: Tues/6, April 8, 14, and 16, 8pm (also April 16, 1pm); April 6, 7:30pm; April 10, 2pm. $8-165. The company performs a mixed-repertory program of works by Sir Frederick Ashton, Jerome Robbins, and Val Caniparoli.

Strong Current Dance Company ODC Theater, 3153 17th St; 863-9834. Thurs-Sat, 8pm. $18-20. The company performs Quiet Pressure, an evening of collaborative work incorporating the art and poetry of the Berkeley-based Sisters Project, among other artists.

Takami and Toumei MoBu Dance Group Jon Sims Center for the Arts, 1519 Mission; 554-0402, www.mobudance.com. Fri-Sat, 8pm. $13-15. The "modern butoh" group performs Shizuki, an experimental collaboration of dance, glass art, and music.

Bay Area

Ballet San Jose Silicon Valley San Jose Center for the Performing Arts, 255 Almaden, San Jose; (408) 288-2800, www.balletsanjose.org. Thurs-Sat, 8pm; Sun, 1:30pm. $22-68. The company's spring repertory program, "Love and Power," features Michael Smuin's Shinju, Dennis Nahat's Cannonade, and Nahat's Quicksilver.

'Bare Bones' Western Sky Studio, 2547 Eighth St, Berk; www.paufvedance.org. Sat, 8pm. $12. Choreographer Randee Paufve and Paufve Dance present this low-tech performance series, featuring works by Paufve and other artists.

Çudamani Zellerbach Hall, Bancroft at Telegraph, UC Berkeley, Berk; (510) 642-9988, www.calperfs.berkeley.edu. Fri, 8pm. $24-46. The 25-member Balinese ensemble performs Odalan Bali: An Offering of Music and Dance.

Jyoti Kala Mandir Performing Company Cubberley Theater, 4000 Middlefield, Palo Alto; (510) 486-9851, www.jyotikalamandir.org. $12-25. Sun, 5pm. Also April 10, 5pm, Julia Morgan Theater, 2640 College, Berk. Same phone and price. The Odissi Indian classical dance company, led by artistic director Jyoti Rout, performs Avatar.

performance

C.A.F.E. Off-Market Theater and Studio, 965 Mission; www.cafearts.com. Thurs, 8pm; Fri, 10pm: "Improv Revolution: Submergency," $5-10. Sat, 10pm: "Ha Bloody Ha!," $10.

Christian Cagigal Exit Theatre, 156 Eddy; (650) 737-8278. Fri-Sat, 8:30pm. $10. The magician performs.

Climate Theater 285 Ninth St; 863-1076. Ongoing. $5. Mon, 8pm: "Monday Night Improv Jam," presented by the San Francisco Improv Co-Operative. Tues, 8pm: "Tuesday Night Improv Special: Night of 1,000 Games," short-form improv jam.

'Comedy on the Square' Shelton Theater, 533 Sutter; 522-8900. Ongoing. $15. Fri, 10pm: "Big City Improv."

'Della Pancha' Shotwell Studios, 3252A 19th St; 920-2223, ftloose@sbcglobal.net. Fri-Sat, 8pm. $10-15. Through April 9. Storyteller, tap-dancer, and singer Mina Liccione performs her solo show. Choreographer Jennie Marshall, comedian Kym Preiss, and others make guest appearances.

'Dirty Little Secret' Empire Plush Room, 940 Sutter; 885-2800, www.empireplushroom.com. Ongoing. Fri-Sat, 11pm. $25. This evening of performance is a "roaring '20s revue."

Chöying Drolma and Steve Tibbetts Swedish American Hall, 2174 Market; 861-5016, www.cafedunord.com. Fri, 8pm. $16. Tibetan Buddhist nun Drolma chants with accompaniment by guitarist Tibbetts.

'Flash Family' Fort Mason Center, Blue Bear Performance Hall, Bldg D; 863-9500, www.improvworks.org. Fri, 8:30pm. $12-14. April Fools improv troop performs.

'The FOB Show' Bindlestiff Studio, 505 Natoma; 255-0440. Thurs-Sat, 8pm. $7-12. Performers tackle Filipino experiences of immigration with sketch comedy, shadow puppetry, photography, and more.

'Kielbasa: Martha Stewart Release Party' Rite Spot, 2099 Folsom; 552-6066, www.kielbasa.com. Thurs, 8:30pm. Free. Kielbasa the "accordion-playing lunch lady" pays homage to Stewart with songs about jail life.

'Killing My Lobster Kabaret' Make Out Room, 3225 22nd St; www.killingmylobster.com. Wed, 8-10pm. $5-10. Paco Romane hosts this monthly cabaret.

'Love at First Sight!' Off-Market Theater, 965 Mission; 869-5384. Fri-Sat, 8pm. $8-12. The Un-Scripted Theater Company performs an "improvised romantic comedy."

'Monday Night Marsh' Marsh, 1062 Valencia; 826-5750, www.themarsh.org. Mon, 8pm. $7. Members of David Ford's Solo Performance Class take to the stage.

'One Night Only Cabaret' Club Fugazi, 678 Green; 421-4222. Mon, 7:30pm. $20-100. This cabaret hosted by Carole Cook features members of Evita and benefits the Richmond/Ermet AIDS Foundation.

'Pharmasupial: Violating HR Policy' SF Playhouse, 536 Sutter; (510) 645-1223. Sat, 10pm. $15. Improv performers base sketches on the working lives of the audience.

'Puri Project' Noh Space, 2840 Mariposa; (510) 914-0401, puriproject@hotmail.com. Fri, 8pm. $15-20. Performance artist Do Hee Lee presents her new piece about postwar healing. Spoken word artist Liz Suk, and composer Jeff Chan also perform.

'Semele' Randall Museum, 199 Museum Way; 972-8934, www.pocketopera.org. Sun, 2pm. $15-30. Donald Pippin Pocket Opera presents Handel's opera. Bharati Soman, Lisa van der Ploeg, Roger McCracken, and Brian Thorsett perform.

'3 Drops of Blood: Installment V' Dance Mission Theater, 3316 24th St; 273-4633. Fri-Sat, 8pm. $16-19. Stephan Pelton Dance Theater, Hyo-Shin Na, Tabla Rasa, Chepikov String Quartet, Jennifer Wright Cook, and Nanos Operetta perform.

Bay Area

'Hitsville U.S.A.' Julia Morgan Center for the Arts, 2640 College, Berk; (925) 798-1300, www.juliamorgan.org. Fri, 8pm; Sat-Sun, 6pm. $15-35. C-Town Performing Arts company performs this play about Motown hitmaker Barry Gordy.

'A Single Woman' Temple Beth Shalom, 642 Dolores, San Leandro; (510) 587-3228, Loma64@yahoo.com. Wed, 7pm. $10. Also: Thurs, 7pm, Redwood Gardens, 2951 Derby, Berk; Sat, 2:30pm, Claremont House, 4500 Gilbert, Oakl. Same phone and price. Performances of this play about activist Jeannette Rankin, the first woman elected to Congress, benefit Women for Peace.

comedy

Brainwash 1122 Folsom; www.brainwash.com. Fri, 8pm: "Brainwash Comedy Competition Finals," free.

Canvas Gallery 1200 Ninth Ave; 504-0010. Tues, 8pm: "Comedy Open Mic Night," with host Susan Alexander, free.

Club Deluxe 1511 Haight; 552-6949. Mon, 9pm: "StandUp Showcase," with rotating hosts Leah Eva and Sam Arno, free.

Cobb's Comedy Club 915 Columbus; www.cobbscomedyclub.com or www.ticketweb.com. Wed, 8pm: "All-Pro Comedy Showcase," $10. Fri-Sat, 8pm and 10:15pm: Marc Maron, $20-22.

50 Mason Lounge 50 Mason; 398-4129, www.50masonlounge.com. Wed-Sat, 8pm: "San Francisco Comedy Club Showcase," $10.

Hotel Utah Saloon 500 Fourth St; www.thehotelutahsaloon.com. Sun, 8pm: Jen Kober, $7.

Green Room Comedy Club 2801 Leavenworth; 674-9333, www.greenroomcomedy.com. Wed and Mon-Tues, 8:30pm: "Green Room Pro Showcase," $10. Thurs-Sun, 8:30pm: Kirk Nolan with Mike Cappazola, $12-20.

Herbst Theatre 401 Van Ness; 392-4400, www.cityboxoffice.com. Fri, 8pm: "Seventh Annual Funny Girlz," with Cathy Ladman, Shann Carr, Carla Clayy, Gretchen Rootes, Lisa Geduldig, and others, $22.50-$27.50.

Luggage Store 1007 Market; www.luggagetuesdays.blogspot.com. Tues, 8pm: Comedy open mic, free.

Mock Cafe 1074 Valencia; 826-5750, ext 5, www.themarsh.org. Sat, 9:30 and 11pm: Stand-up comedy, $7.

Purple Onion 140 Columbus; 956-1635. Thurs, 9pm: "Purple Onion Comedy Night," with Will Durst, $10.

SFCC Club House 414 Mason, Ste 705; www.sfcomedycollege.com. Sat, 8pm: "The Stand-up Project," free.

Uptown 200 Capp; 206-9997. Wed, 8:30pm: "Uptown Comedy Open Mic," hosted by Eric Peterson, free.

spoken

Open mics take place almost every night in cafés throughout the Bay Area. If you want to perform, show up about half an hour before start time to put your name on the list. A day-by-day guide to spoken word events and featured readers:

Wednesday: Canvas Cafe 1200 Ninth Ave, SF; (415) 504-0060, mike@westcoastvideo.net. "Open Mic Talent Showcase," 7:30pm, free. Lost and Found Saloon 1353 Grant, SF; (415) 981-9557. Open mic with host Chris Brown, 8:30pm, free.

Thursday: 16th Street and Mission BART plaza 16th St at Mission, SF; (415) 255-9881. "CAI Street Arts Workshop," open mic, 9:30pm, free. Mediterraneum Cafe 2475 Telegraph, Berk; (510) 526-5985. "Word Beat Reading Series," with featured readers Eugene David and John Rowe, 7pm, free. EastSide Arts Alliance 2587 International Blvd, Oakl; (510) 533-6629. "Holla Back," open mic, 8:30-10:30pm, donations accepted.

Friday: California College of the Arts 1111 Eighth St, SF; www.sptraffic.org. "New Experiments: Rob Fitterman," 7:30pm, $5-10.

Saturday: Red Vic Peace Center 1665 Haight, SF; (415) 864-1978. "Open Mic and Hot Tamales," 5-9pm, free. Pegasus Books 2349 Shattuck, Berk; (510) 649-1320. "The Last Word Poetry Series," with featured readers Scott Wannberg and Carlye Archibeque, 8pm, free. Strawberry Creek Lodge 1320 Addision, Berk; (510) 527-9905. Open mic hosted by the Bay Area Poets Coalition, 3-5pm, free.

Sunday: Cafe Prague 584 Pacific, SF; (415) 905-8837. Justin Desmangles reads, plus open mic, 4-5:30pm, free. Cody's Books 2454 Telegraph, Berk; (510) 845-7852. "Poetry Flash," with Sophie Cabot Black and David Breskin, 7:30pm, $2. Sweetie's 475 Francisco, SF; (415) 433-2343. Charselle hosts an open mic with featured reader Rebecca Solnit, 7:30pm, free.

Monday: Purple Onion 140 Columbus, SF; (415) 217-8400, www.caffemacaroni.com. Open mic hosted by the Kitchenettes, 7pm, $5. Priya Indian Cuisine 2072 San Pablo, Berk; berkeleypoetryexpress@yahoo.com. "Poetry Express," with featured reader Nazelah Jamison, 7pm, free. Brainwash 1122 Folsom, SF; (415) 255-4866. "Cafe Haiku Slam," hosted by Caffeine Society, 7pm, free. Bird and Beckett Books and Records 2788 Diamond, SF; (415) 586-3733. Poet Don Brennan reads, plus open mic, 7:30pm, free.

Tuesday: Black Repertoire Group Theatre 3201 Adeline, Berk; (510) 652-2120. "Twighlight Tuesdays," open mic, 7-9pm, $5. World Ground Cafe 3726 MacArthur Blvd, Oakl; (510) 482-2933. "Poetry Diversified," open mike with featured readers L. Abdul Kenyatta and Mack Dennis, 7:30-9pm, free.