Marke B.

Clubs: Asses of Evil!

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Calling all queer Arabs, Middle Easterners, and North Africans (and lusty friends) -- time for another wild, dancefloor-packing Bibi party, habibis!

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Yep, it's gonna be packed -- featuring DJs Emancipacion, Bahman, and Honey Soundsystem's own Josh Cheon. Read more »

"Never surrender!" Romney surrenders

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Welp, the boardroom Mormon is out, and now it's up to Bridge Over River McCain and Huckabee Hound to feast on his Republican delegates' innards. (I think. Read more »

Clubs: Trannyshack (fuzzy) memories

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"The truth can finally be told, Marke B.," said Trannyshack mama bear Heklina when I talked to her about her raucous 12-year-old trash-drag weekly at the Stud going dark in August. "I was gonna shut it down on our 10th anniversary -- that's just such a good, round number -- but I was in talks for the past two years with some big time studios about a Trannyshack reality series, so I kept it going. Read more »

Accidental tranny

Trannyshack drags its gay ass to the finish line, and DJ Cheb i Sabbah takes another fab global leap
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superego@sfbg.com

SUPER EGO Guilty! I'm totally real-time guilty. Yeps, frenz, I'm that spastic whore on the dance floor whooping like a neon cough, flinging my Mary Kate triceps up when a thump drops in the mix. If a club has one of those heinous black lights at the door, I sneak in the back so no one spots the glowing spunk on my skirt or my phosphorescent VCR. I always ask for extra antioxidant-rich lychees in my pomegranatini, to offset the American Spirits. OK, I've blown the DJ. Read more »

G-Spot: Everyone's a wiener

The GayVN Awards wrap the best gay dick of 2007 in an envelope of surprise
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marke@sfbg.com

You'd think that amid all of the bell tolling and hand-wringing about DIY online media proliferation, professionally produced gay porn would have gone the way of the floppy disk and dial-up modem long ago. (Remember waiting 20 minutes for free stud-muffin bitmaps to download, pixel by aching pixel, onto your 10-inch monitor? Ah, AOL blue balls. Whither the '90s?)

But no - gay porn is the new fireplace.

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Voting and drinking (and a 14" penis)

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Tuesday, 9:09pm

In anticipation of guzzling free Stella, the Kilowatt has been jammed with voting drinkers since 6pm – well before the Guardian-sposored "Dodge the Drafts" party’s official start time. As for who these drinkers supported today, it’s impossible to guess -- even tho I’m surround by fellow Guardian employees, and within eyesight of a woman lustily fingering Obama's Audacity of Hope. Read more »

Tearjerkin' for Obama

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Here we are, awash in the shivers and shudders of another (incredibly fatiguing) election cycle. And although reports are streaming in of another Hillary sob session, the big news on the gushing front is that new star-studded "Yes We Can" vid, produced by Black-Eyed Pea frontman will i. Read more »

NYC Fashion Week = SF blues

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Yes, I'm a total fashion whore, but I live in SF -- land of lame Macy's Passports and a dowager-drenched SF Fashion Week. Thus, this is one of my long-distancest fashion-whoriest times around -- fab collection mania in the tents of Manhattan. Read more »

SPORTS: Super Bowl upsets, ads cause nausea

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By AJ Hayes

We don't make it a habit of rooting for New York teams, but the Giants' improbable upset of New England on Sunday night was fantastic. Not only did it result in one of the best games in Super Bowl history, but it managed to wipe some of the smugness off the face of Patriots coach Bill Belichick. A sore loser and a cheat, Belichick is one of the more odorous fellows in sports today.

It also ended the talk once and for all that Tom Brady is the equal of Joe Montana. Read more »

Hot buns and fat bombs

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How delightful! Staring this Wednesday (Ash Wednesday for all you Cathaholics), Noe Valley Bakery will quench your Fat Tuesday, aka Mardi Gras, hangovers by offering delicious-sounding hot cross buns ("Our version is made from nutmeg scented yeast dough filled with currants and almonds. Read more »