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NOISE: Britney in bikini shape? And K-Fed 2.0?

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Whoa, the juicy Brit Spears "gossip" of the day is pictured on TMZ, you non-TMZ junkies. Check the new Britney consort. Who is the mystery dude? He's more muscular than the ex, yet still somewhat K-Fed-esque, and for all we know, he hasn't recorded any "music" yet! Always a plus. Now about that bandana...

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Ahoy, baby weight! Courtesy of www.tmz.com.

NOISE: Lady sov takes another stab!

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Guardian contributor Ari Messer checked out Lady Sovereign at the Mezzanine on Jan. 8. Here's his review of the show:

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Love her or hate her - doesn't she look adorable?

Around seventh or eighth grade I made the transition from oversized Stussy sweatshirts and hypercolor basketball T-shirts to even bigger local punk band tees -- I remember a burgundy Fury 66 shirt that reached to my knees. Read more »

Time-traveling flirtation of the day, week, month...

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Lucio Battisti circa 1970 and 1971, I have a big crush on you. When time travel goes into effect, please meet me and some friends within the fucking great and gorgeous music of your Amore E Non Amore and Umanamente Uomo: Il Sogno.

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NOISE: Chavez lives, live

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Guardian contributor Michael Harkin caught Chavez's reunion performance at Slim's on Dec. 30. Here's his review:

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Chavez’s return to playing live shows certainly isn’t a comeback of the “we were once stars, and are now in need of money” variety. The ear-ringing muscularity of their take on ‘90s indie rock could conceivably have found a place in the popular consciousness in 1995-1996, but somehow it didn’t work out that way. Read more »

Out on the Bloc

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OK, OK I know we're beyond the gawker-closet phase ("OMG he's gay???). I ain't no Valley Girl. But -- MEOW. One of my favorite singers ever just stepped gingerly over the shoe-tree threshhold. Read more »

Call the pedophile police

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I just spent an inordinate amount of important mirror time in thrall to 16-year Brit sensation Lil Chris. Somebody shoot me. Winner of some sort of British Idol-like contest progged by Gene Simmons from Kiss, he's like Hanson singing Buzzcocks songs. Read more »

NOISE: 21 Grams...? For a Rogue cause

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You love Gram Parsons, you know you do. Hot Burritos are your real-deal meal. Nudie suits are so cute. Dark ends of streets are where we meet.

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So you know you wanna c'mon down to the seventh annual "Sleepless Nights," Gram Parsons tribute and benefit concert, Saturday, Jan. 13, at Great American Music Hall. Read more »

NOISE: Imagine Mac World Weir-ed

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Not-dead Dead member alert! Macworld plug alert!

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The John Lennon Educational Tour Bus, a nonprofit state-of-the-art mobile recording and multimedia studio, will pulling into the Macworld Conference & Expo in San Francisco and stopping for a spell, from Monday, Jan. 8, through Thursday, Jan. 12. Read more »

NOISE: Sonic Oldster sing-along

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Yeah, everyone's tired of those Sonic Youth AARP jokes - but this clip takes the cake for the sheer enjoyment - behold Young@Heart singing SY's "Schizophrenia."

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NOISE: 10 to the 75

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75 Degrees' Rick Bond was late with his holiday year-end Top 10 in terms of the print edition of the Guardian, but it's never too late for our always-interested, always-ravenous-for-news blogestablishmentarianistic virtual side. Fill our Top 10 void, Rick. Here 'tis, at last:

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75 Degrees of inseparableness. Courtesy of www.rasputinmusic.com

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