... club sandwiches. BUT formerly local club kids Justin Bond and Kenny Mellman -- aka KIKI and HERB -- have really made good. They're currently alive on Broadway at the (dear lord) Helen Hayes Theatre in "Kiki & Herb: Alive on Broadway," and they're garnering effusive raves, like this one in today's NYTimes.

Way back when I was but a wee thing doing loads of drugs in the light booth at Josie's Cabaret & Juice Joint, I totally used to groove to them, back when they were locals (they're bigtime newyawkaws now) -- and back when their combo of post-kitsch musical cabaret mentality and slyly sincere emotional buffeting was totally radical. Turns out it still is, as anyone who went to K&H's New Year's Eve show this year at Herbst Theater can attest. Go Justin! Go Kenny! See? Club Trash can be artistically relevant. Just like maybe murdered beauty pageant tots. Now all we need is a Jason Mecier retrospective at the Smithsonian and Ggreg Taylor on Oprah.