By Sarah Phelan
The Right Hand Man
If Shakespeare were alive, he’d be penning The Right Hand Man , a three-act play exploring the potent mix of narcissism, self-doubt, control freakishness and horniness that led Mayor Gavin Newsom to roundly betray himself and former campaign manager Alex Tourk, by sleeping with Tourk’s wife, Ruby Rippey Tourk.
At least that way, folks would get some kind of analysis of what Newsom was thinking during that secretive, backstabbing time, something they won’t get as long as Newsom refuses to talk to the press. Newsom's silence only makes the rumor mills spin faster, as people are reduced to browsing back copies of San Francisco magazine, in which the topic of why Gavin isn’t smiling is explored, including Newsom answers on what dating was like post-divorce. (“It’s impossible. It’s very hard. It’s awkward at best…it’s been very unsuccessful,” Newsom replies.)
Then there’s “The Right Hand Man” profile of Alex Tourk in 7x7 magazine, in which Tourk is revealed to have been on call 24/7 during his three years as Newsom’s deputy chief of staff, which was period that the affair ocurred and before Tourk raised $600, 000 for Newsom as his 2007 campaign manager. Nor should gossip mongers forget Benefit magazine ,where Tourk and former Newsom flame Brittanie Mountz now both work (Wow, wonder what people talk about in the women's bathroom there.)
Honestly, wouldn’t it be better for Newsom to come clean with the details of what was going on, why and where, so we won’t have to listen to people bitching on about whether the affair happened on tax-payers’ dollars. Speaking of which, it’ll take about three months before that $15,000 a month allowance that Newsom has agreed to pay Alex Tourk cancels out the pay rise that voters awarded Newsom last November, a vote that bumped up Newsom’s pay by about $44,000 from $188,816 to $233,000 in one fell swoop.