Guardian voices: Eliana on the Ross case

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Photo by SF Newspaper Co. LLC

Since this nightmare began nine months ago, my integrity, intelligence and independence have been attacked over and over again by individuals claiming to defend me. In every instance, I’ve been cast as an immigrant woman with limited English proficiency who is incapable of asserting her rights, understanding domestic violence, or speaking with her own voice. I’ve been characterized as ignorant, submissive, vulnerable -- but also hysterical, vindictive and manipulative. I’m either a “hot-blooded Latina” or a fool, duped by my husband.

The mayor and his allies -- each with their political or financial interest at stake -– have lined up to silence me or distort what really happened. They claim my voice doesn’t matter, that I can’t be trusted, but, have they ever, ever, bothered to talk to me directly? No.

They prefer an inflammatory vague 50-second video clip to the truth. In the midst of an argument on December 31, 2011, my husband grabbed my arm for a second and bruised me -- it was not intentional. I have never recanted this fact. He was wrong, and he apologized. That was the extent of it. I know this because I was there. It was my experience.  It happened to me. And it never happened before.

After the argument, I made the irreversible decision to trust a neighbor who represented herself as an attorney because of potential custody issues complicated by the fact that I didn't have my Green Card yet.

That violation of trust, followed by a surreal chain of events triggered the unimaginable. Without my consent, confidential information was floated to media operatives. Four days later, again without my consent, the police were called. Clearly there was no emergency. This all happened before Ross was sheriff.

On January 13, Ross was forcibly separated away from me and our son -- something I never wanted nor was consulted about. This devastated us. By trying to take responsibility and hoping to reunite us sooner, in March, Ross took a plea that I never wanted him to take. When Ross wouldn't resign as Sheriff, they suspended him without pay causing me and our son to relocate to Venezuela where I could work.

From afar, when the Ethics Commission deliberations began, me and many Latinos watched democracy tested in San Francisco. Ultimately, all the charges they piled on against Ross were unanimously rejected. All, but the very charge that Ross handed them back in March so that we could move forward.

After seven long months of being forced apart, we're now reunited, family-strong and committed to seeing this process through. But what many don't know or find hard to believe is how local officials tried to use my family as a weapon to remove Ross from elected office. When Ross wouldn't resign, they dehumanized him in the press or attacked my credibility to suit their narrative.

At the very beginning of this madness, from the police releasing the worst photo of Ross to their leaking of private information, to the District Attorney's total disregard for me or my son's well-being, to the mayor’s taking action against Ross without ever talking to me, to the Ethics Commission’s insult to my integrity -- it all sends the message that if you are a woman in San Francisco and involved in a domestic violence situation, the last thing you would ever want to do is reach out to those authorities we need to trust.

In part, that may explain a report recently on local National Public Radio that San Francisco has the lowest prosecution of DV cases among the nine Bay Area counties. Those statistics aren't improved by ignoring the voters that elected Ross as sheriff.

Make no mistake. The mayor wants the Board of Supervisor's October 9 vote on my family’s future to occur in the most political atmosphere possible.  Not even the appearance of political motive seems to matter since the mayor opposed delaying the vote until after the November election. This isn’t about me or my husband. This is about a political machine that has attempted to turn one woman’s body into the biggest blow against progressive politics in San Francisco in decades.

Eliana Lopez is a mother, wife to Ross Mirkarimi, and a film, television and theater actress. For more information: www.friendsofross.com; facebook: stand with ross

Comments

Just go away. Forever. Please. You have no shame.

Posted by Ruth Bladder Ginsu on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 11:54 am

This commenter has been throroughly disgusting at every turn.

Posted by lillipublicans on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 12:09 pm
Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:18 pm

You are describing yourself. Why don't you take that advice.

Posted by Akvanediv on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 7:25 pm

No it is you that needs to go away. Thanks.

Posted by jccourt on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 10:53 am
Posted by Hortencia on Oct. 08, 2012 @ 8:03 am

There's only one lonely sad feminist who supports Ross, but she'd like you to think there were legion.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 08, 2012 @ 9:22 am

What is the best way to remove a setting Sheriff from office after you failed to buy the office. Well let's see. First you have to understand that the only legal means is impeachment. Now what qualifies as an impeachable offensive? Wow, there's only ONE for a seated Sheriff and I'll give you one guess what it is "Domestic Violence". Now add to that the fact that San Francisco police department has had substantial budget cuts that directly effects citizens safety, but 6 POLICE officers from a stressed budget can be used to go door to door asking question about their neighbor the Sheriff, exspecially when no charges were filed. Understanding SF has one of the lowest prosecution rates of DV, these actions are unprecedented. Mix this up with an Organization that was lied to and used to validate their political grab, which to me is emotional rape. To use a Organization that has always protected women and their children to tear apart a family and rip a child from his father at an age that could scare him for life is more than unforgivable

Posted by Guest on Oct. 09, 2012 @ 6:57 am

"Wow, did I fuck up or what?"

You recorded yourself on videotape, in tears, discussing how you feared your husband (an elected official), showing bruises he had inflicted upon you, and stating that it had happened prior.

And it didn't turn out too well?

Gee, no shit, huh? Moron.

Posted by Scram on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 12:13 pm

Asshole!

Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:02 pm

Nobody has ever listen to what Eliana Lopez had to say, the DA, the courts (Judge Breal, Judge Wong), the SF appeals court, the DV advocates, the so called ethics commission, the Mayor, the city attorney and his staff, the Chronicle newspaper, etc...

This city is rotten to the core. Thanks.

Posted by jccourt on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 11:00 am

seemingly chronic inability to shut her mouth at the right times and open it when it helps her case. She's evidently learned nothing during the intervening 10 months.

Also - why do her texts read like someone who struggles with English while this prose flows like warm honey? Curious that...

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:01 pm

conversation about what happened in her life and why. Perhaps you need to read the record,especially her testimony ...long , elegant testimony.,.in front of the Ethics Commission. She rocked city hall, making the ethics czarinas decidedly uncomfortable with their forgone conclusion and vote.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:23 pm

You're so transparent with your "elegant" in reference to Eliana and your mean-spirited asides towards feminist women, like "ethnic czarinas." You are shameful - stay in Sacramento and leave the SF politics up to people, like me, who actually live here.

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:13 pm

Not that it is anything surprising. Its exactly the kind of behavior you'd expect from a Troll, which is why I prefer that screen name over the many others it uses.

Guest referred to "ethics czarinas" *not* "ethnic czarinas" ... and, good point Guest!

Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:34 pm

Everyone appreciates your efforts.

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:49 pm

"Ethnic czarina" your words?

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 9:01 am

The original commenter wrote of "Ethics Czarinas" -- not "Ethnic Czarinas"; Troll II, Orwell's Uterus, Ruth Bladder Ginsu, -- Enrique? -- you are a truly vile creature.

Posted by lillipublicans on Oct. 05, 2012 @ 10:18 am

shut up when he tells them to. When they don't obey, he "learns" them. This is the perfect time for Eliana to be heard. The BOS takes up the matter Oct. 9.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:26 pm

He certainly has strong opinions on the matter - now doesn't he?

:-)

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:11 pm

Okay. So now he grabbed her arm and bruised her. At the ethics hearing she said that she jerked her arm away and bruised herself.

Just trying to keep track of the amazing wonder-bruise and its current status.

Also, not sure why anyone would feel entitled to have the timing of the vote delayed so that the voters would not know how their representatives handled it. When do we ever take steps to make sure that the voters have less information about how their representatives act?

Posted by Troll on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 2:26 pm

First she says there have been other bruises, then just one but Ross caused it, then it was really because she "pulled away".

Who can believe a word that comes out of the mouth of this woefully miserable specimen? She schemed, it backfired, and now she wants our pity?

Ross and Eliana are perfect each other. Just somewhere else. In the name of God, woman, go.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 3:38 am

Eliana never said "there have been other bruises"

You call her, feminist that you are," a woefully miserable specimen"

Let's see what you look like.

as for the God you invoke, do you also believe in the tooth fairy?

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 9:03 am

This city owe an apology to Eliana Lopez.

It is also the duty of the board of supervisors to reinstate the duly elected sheriff of San Francisco.

Now you go away Guest. Thanks.

Posted by jccourt on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 11:37 am

try this on yourself. grab your own arm and then pull away swiftly..Are you strong enough? is there a bruise?

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 9:05 am

Behind those innocent appearing rational arguments to defend the anti Domestic violence movement is the face of tyranny abolishing democracy and the will of the voters and this tyrant will always come as a rational voice in this instance here to protect the people from a man who grabbed his wife’s arm and left a black and blue mark. The black and blue mark cannot be high jacked to serve a corrupt mayor steeped in election and ballot fraud and corruption going back 2 decades nor can these same interests be allowed to high jack the anti domestic violence movement with payments for billboards and promises of funding.

Posted by thatsthewayitis on Oct. 05, 2012 @ 8:13 am

too much trouble for you to do some work? Eliana testified that he grabbed her arm and that she pulled away...

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 10:39 am

...to a video camera, n tears, that this was the second time this was happening. I believed her then; her subsequent versions, not so much.

Posted by Hortencia on Oct. 08, 2012 @ 8:01 am

What we saw on video was authentic and spontaneous. There is no question as to which of her two contradictory accounts is more honest and valid and truthful.

Posted by Anonymous on Oct. 08, 2012 @ 9:20 am

I hope that Eliana Lopez realizes that the mean commenters here are the very same trolls who show up here day after day to bash progressives. I hope she doesn't take it to heart. I hope she knows that she has a lot of support of most reasonable San Franciscans who are appalled at the way her family has been used as a weapon for political purposes. I hope she knows that the vast majority of people admire her for the way she has held up through all this. For standing up for her family and for the dignity of all women. I hope that Ms. Lopez knows that she was magnificent when she went before the Ethics Commission. And that she has every reason to hold her head high. But then I suspect she does know this. And that what a few vindictive types have to say is truly not important.

Posted by Ana on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:18 pm

the rest think he and Eliana should exit stage left.

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 3:32 pm

Ana, please try to remember that a lot of us who want Mirkarimi gone ARE progressives. Wanting an abusive liar gone from any position of responsibility in city government is a progressive position.

Posted by Hortencia on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 4:23 pm

I don't think so.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 5:05 pm

...like we thought Mirkarimi was before this incident. Many of us who want him gone thought he was a great D5 supe and supported his sheriff campaign, including with money.

Posted by Hortencia on Oct. 08, 2012 @ 7:56 am

Ross didn't lie, Eliana didn't lie, you lie by pretending to be a progressive.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 9:06 am

Someone disagrees with your point of view and that justifies calling them a whore? How progressive and tolerant of you.

Posted by D. Native on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 9:26 am

nor will I ever be a "progressive".
It must be difficult for you to have that name,Whoretencia.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 10:38 am

@Hortencia. It appears that there is more evidence of official misconduct by the Mayor and the city attorney than by the Sheriff. Thanks.

Posted by jccourt on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 11:43 am

Yes, Hortencia.

Aaron Peskin said that Walter Wong said that Ed Lee lied.

How can you possibly dispute that incontrovertible evidence?

And don't give us that hearsay crap. Aaron Peskin is a Progressive, making hearsay laws irrelevant. As a Progressive his word is taken as truth above all others.

Posted by Steroidal Progressive on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 12:01 pm

hear hear! (or is it here here?)

Posted by Daniele E. on Oct. 05, 2012 @ 8:33 am

This conspiracy angle of hers is so weird, it pushes all of the left wing conspiracy buttons, and comes up with nothing. Anyone who falls for all of those strung together catch-all Cliché's is a serious dupe.

As Sheriff Ross was done as a legislator, he may have been able to mouth off to the true believers, but as Sheriff he was heading towards semi-non-entity status. Why the conspiracy would waste it's time on him is a mystery. That "progressives" eat this conspiracy non sense up is just comical.

Why when a politician or public figure gets caught doing something stupid it's everyone else's fault?

Posted by matlock on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 5:53 pm

"After the argument, I made the irreversible decision to trust a neighbor who represented herself as an attorney because of potential custody issues complicated by the fact that I didn't have my Green Card yet."

Huh? A Green Card takes three months to get. You've been here for years.

Don't believe it.

Posted by Demented, Yet Terribly, Terribly Persistent on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 8:08 pm

now I suggest you go to www.citireport.com and read Ivory Madison, in her own words.

She'd be a good nightmare match for you.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 10:41 am

Normally, getting a Green Card for the spouse of a US citizen is pretty straightforward.

I guess that if there are complications, there are complications...

Posted by Demented, Yet Terribly, Terribly Persistent on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 1:53 pm

"From afar, when the Ethics Commission deliberations began, me and many Latinos watched democracy tested in San Francisco."

And those evil domestic violence advocates are all white, aren't they, Eliana?

She just can't help continuing to play the race card, can't she?

Posted by Demented, Yet Terribly, Terribly Persistent on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 8:13 pm

have been bought off and are now part of the conspiracy. Hopefully Eliana, queen of the Latinas, can "educate" them after she's done spinning her little tale of woe. One, I might add, in which her husband plays little to no part.

Posted by Troll II on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 8:50 pm

"At the very beginning of this madness, from the police releasing the worst photo of Ross"

You mean his mug shot? You are aware that the police don't take multiple mug shots and let the arrestee choose the best one? Next time Ross is arrested, tell him not to close his eyes for the mug shot - he'll get better with practice.

"This is about a political machine that has attempted to turn one woman’s body into the biggest blow against progressive politics in San Francisco in decades."

Actually, the voters have dealt far bigger blows to progressive politics in San Francisco than this on repeated occasions...

Posted by Demented, Yet Terribly, Terribly Persistent on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 8:24 pm

This is so well-written and so truthful.

Posted by Guest Vivian on Oct. 03, 2012 @ 10:21 pm

"This is so well-written and so truthful."

And I'm sure Eliana wrote every word of it!

Posted by Demented, Yet Terribly, Terribly Persistent on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 3:54 am

Yeah, Eliana, we get it. You tried to manipulate your husband by conspiring with your neighbors to exaggerate Ross's abuse of you. Next thing you know, it's spiralled out of control, Ross loses his job, and you realise you've made an error.

Here's a clue lady - get over it. There are implications to all our misdeeds, and your cunning plan has backfired on you.

So who is worse here? Ross for his abuse and arrogance? Or you with your whiney, whimpering self-pity?

Frankly, ma'am, I don't give a damn. Nor does anyone else. You made your bed - now lie on it.

Posted by Guest on Oct. 04, 2012 @ 3:35 am