SUPER EGO How could anyone say no to Joan Rivers? The turbulent past, the red-carpet gushes, the petrified visage? Sure, we could blame her for Kathy Griffin and the rise of celebrity culture, but she also created the one true tagline of our time in a Geico commercial that defined a generation: "I can't feel my face!" Recently roasted, the hysterically hysterical comedian is gracing us with her presence in early October, and the only time she could talk to me was smack dab in the middle of Folsom Street Fair. So I unhooked myself and ducked in to a Porta-Potty to call her in New York.
SFBG Hi Joan, please forgive any background noise. I'm calling you from our giant leather fetish festival, the Folsom Street Fair.
Joan Rivers Fantastic! I'm there with you in my heart.
SFBG I remember you were here in San Francisco this time last year. The gay press published the screaming headline, "Leather Fair a huge success!" with a big picture of your face underneath it.
JR I really couldn't ask for much more.
SFBG This year's fair falls on Yom Kippur, so you get the beatings and the atonement all in one. Do you observe Yom Kippur?
JR I do observe it. I'm the matron of my family, so I have a huge dinner to prepare!
SFBG I'll keep it short and sweet, then. I adore your signature line of jewelry that you sell on QVC. Lately, I've seen many up-and-coming drag queens wearing your items.
JR It's such an absolutely gorgeous collection, and I'm not just saying that because it's mine. It's truly exquisite, and I'm sure it looks lovely on the girls.
SFBG It really does. And congratulations on your hard-fought win on this year's Celebrity Apprentice. You went tooth and nail!
JR The best part was donating my winnings to [meal-delivery service to AIDS patients] God's Love We Deliver, a charity I've been supporting for years. Let me tell you, Marke, it was such a thrilling experience. Would I do it all again? No.
SFBG At 76, you're still doing standup. You're doing four shows in two nights at Cobb's. Good lord! What are the crowds like here?
JR I love San Francisco. I once lived there for a month when I was in residence at the Magic Theater and it was a beautiful time. San Francisco is smart and it's gay. What more do you need as a performer?
JOAN RIVERS Fri/2 and Sat/3, 7:30 p.m. and 9:30 p.m., $53.50–$55. Cobb's Comedy Club, 915 Columbus, SF. www.cobbscomedy.com  ----------
FEEL THE LOVE
"Our club is for young people," the promoter of a popular electro club responded cooly when I asked if her tribe would have a presence at LovEvolution, formerly Lovefest, formerly Love Parade, on Saturday, Oct. 3. It's true that the programming of the massive outdoor raveathon can seem a bit, er, mature. But the all-ages party is bursting with eager youth, with a youthful outlook to match, even as it seems more and more panicky about reeling in out-of-town Big Names. The true local and new will be found on the smaller parade floats, with California Dubstep Republic, Homochic, and the "Janky Barge" looking especially twisty. And this time around, at the satellite parties, the kids are in for one holy cow of a house education. DJ Frankie Knuckles will show them why he's the godfather of house at Temple (www.templesf.com) and the awesomely gifted and underage Martinez Brothers will represent the next soulful wave at Mighty (www.mighty119.com), both on Fri/2. Also at Mighty, on Sunday, Oct.4, is an event that everyone in Clubland is wetting their drawers for. One of the best parties I've ever been to (and spent a ton of frequent flyer miles on), New York City's Body and Soul, is popping up for one night here in San Francisco, reuniting founding DJs Francois K., Danny Krivit, and Joe Clausell. It's all too much, and that's quite a bit of the point.