All the New Year's Eve parties you need to get your ring-a-ding-ding on in style
SUPER EGO Hey, hey, hey — it's that time again — New Year's Eve comes hard upon us. Avoid the amateur hour on the streets and duck (sauce) into these warm ragers. All parties below take place Tue/31. Find more rockin' NYE shindigs here  and general fun events here . Clink!
Damn, I love this performer, who makes live hip-hop and '90s big-room beats at lightning speed — and knows how to get a crowd up. He's with DJ Apollo and St. John at Temple's grand three-room NYE.
9pm-4am, $50–$60. Temple, 540 Howard, SF. www.templesf.com 
Hundreds of hot fat, furry, friendly gay guys dancing 2013 right out the door — how 'bout it? With DJs Paul Goodyear and Matt Stands.
9pm-late, $20 advance. Beatbox, 314 11th St, SF. www.bearracuda.com 
"Pop the Pork" with drag goddess Juanita More and Sidekick on the decks, plus hostess with the mostest chicharrones Walter, at fashionable gay sex dungeon the Powerhouse. Lots of flesh and pretty mess.
9pm-2am, $5–$10. Powerhouse, 1347 Folsom, SF. www.powerhouse-sf.com 
The gorgeous House of Babes presents this pink hip-hop blowout, hosted by Kelly Lovemonster and Krylon Superstar, with tunes by DJs Pink Lightning, Rapidfire, Boyfriend, Jenna Riot, davO, and more. Get on it!
9pm-late, $10 advance. f8, 1192 Folsom, SF. bigqueernye.eventbrite.com 
Let's mash all that 2013 ish up and fire only positive vibes — and kooky costumes! — into next year. DJ Adrian and Mysterious D's inimitable mashup party pulls out all the stops. The theme of this four-room banger? Sh!t show, of course.
9pm-late, $30–$40. DNA Lounge, 375 11th St, SF. www.dnalounge.com 
Lezzies! Queers! Friends! Lend me your New Years: This party at too-cute dyke bar the Lexington will cause you enough fun trouble for the rest of 2014. With DJs Footy and Janine Da Feen.
9pm-2am, free. Lexington Club, 3464 19th St, SF. www.lexingtonclub.com 
My favorite rapper of the moment brings his goofball cheer and anarchic antics to Mezzanine — who knows what's gonna happen? With Traxamillion and Flatbush Zombies.
9pm-late, $45–$85. Mezzanine, 444 Jessie, SF. www.mezzaninesf.com 
The name of this party is far less creative than the wonderful music that will be playing — and that everyone will sing along to. Special guest: Kurt Harland from Information Society! Any guesses as to what they'll play at midnight? (My money's on the Human League's "Fascination" — but you know Kurt will probably have to play "Pure Energy.")
9pm-4am, $20. Cat Club, 1190 Folsom, SF. www.sfcatclub.com 
Aw, who can resist the sweet, disco-haunted catchiness of this live NYC duo, who met cute in seventh grade. Fun, dancey times.
9pm, $30. Independent, 628 Divisadero, SF. www.theindependentsf.com 
Burner royalty the Pink Mammoth crew takes over Mighty, with energetic UK duo Blond:ish headlining a "night of sexiness" (LOL why is it never a "night of sexiness" when there's a good-looking male headliner?). It'll be a rampager.
9pm-late, $40. Mighty, 119 Utah, SF. www.mighty119.com 
The classic soulful ladies' party is back, as El Rio celebrates a queer New Year. "Hot hip-hop and spicy Latin beats" from Olga T, Marcella, and more (plus yummy gumbo and burgers!) and an even hotter and spicier crowd.
8pm-2am, $15. El Rio, 3158 Mission, SF. www.tinyurl.com/mangonye2014 
The leather-jacketed, pompadoured pretty boy's own music has an exquisite dark techno sound descended from Depeche Mode — when he DJs, as he will here, he expands that with an incredibly deep knowledge of house and techno (he's from Detroit, duh). This Honey Soundsystem + Sunset + Public Works collaboration will bring out an amazing crowd of party freaks.
9pm-4am, $20–$40. Public Works, 131 Erie, SF. www.publicsf.com 
The annual Streets of SF party is visually stunning and draws great headliners (although the crowd is a little broad). This year, everyone's favorite vegan techno-punk Moby graces us with his exacting presence on the turntables.
9pm-2am, $160. Fort Mason, 2 Marina Blvd, SF. streetsofsfnye-fb.eventbrite.com 
Motown on Mondays, one of SF's best things, is teaming up with supercute global-funk trumpeter Will Magid and his crew (including vocalist Aima the Dreamer) for a very night of worldly sounds and classy cheer.
8pm-2am, $40. Local Edition, 691 Market, SF. www.momfam.com 
If you add classic '90s electronic act Crystal Method to the Kink Armory (transformed from giant porn studio into a "kaleidoscopic wonderland" for the occasion), and pour on the high-flyin' Vau de Vire Society troupe and Opel rave crew — you will definitely get a party, a new Bohemia, even.
9pm-4am, $50 and up. Kink Armory, 1800 Mission, SF. www.newbohemianye.com 
Don your gay fetish apparel — oh wait, that was the last holiday. OK, hit the reset and don your gay fetish apparel again, as Casey Spooner and Ministat host (and DJ DAMnation DJs) this kinky-boots ring-in, the Eagle's first.
9pm-2am, $15 in gear, $20 without. SF Eagle, 398 12th St, SF. www.sf-eagle.com 
"Let love bloom" is the theme of this massive EDM-fest at Oracle Arena. Headiners include Nero, New World Punx, and Bingo Players.
6pm-2am, $100–$140, 18+. Oracle Arena, 7000 Coliseum Way, Oakl. www.popnye.com 
Yes! One of my favorite ever DJ duos — their specialty is rare disco and funk edits mixed with sunny, psychedelic house vibes — comes to Monarch for what it's calling the Extravaganza Ball (no vogueing, confusingly, but OK). Sleight of Hand, Greer, Shiny Objects, and more round off this deliciously breezy outtake on the past year.
9pm-late, $40–$100. Monarch, 101 Sixth St, SF. www.monarchsf.com 
Start off the new year on a good foot, as the People crew spreads war soulful house vibes and celebrates the life of Nelson Mandela with a fabulously colorful crowd — a rainbow nation, indeed. With Jayvi Velasco, Patrick Wilson, Cecil, and many more.
9pm-3am, $10–$20. New Parish, 579 18th St, SF. www.thenewparish.com 
The annual sight-and-sound explosion moves to the cavernous Bill Graham Civic Auditorium, with a huge lineup to match: Thievery Corporation, Little Dragon, A-Trak, Dillon Francis, Emancipator, LowRIDERz, Minnesota, the dirtybird crew, and many, many more.
8pm-3am, $90 and up, 18+. Bill Graham Civic Auditorium, 99 Grove, SF. www.seaofdreamsnye.com 
The Elbo Room brings its tremendously successful soul Saturdays to NYE. Do the mashed potato with Phengren Oswald, Paul Paul, and more.
9pm-2am, $20–$25. Elbo Room, 647 Valencia, SF. www.elbo.com 
Style, people, style! This Symphony tradition may be one you need to save up for, but it's dapper, dazzling, and just plain dandy. Everything from classic Viennese songbook tunes (with mezzo-soprano Sasha Cooke) to swing jams with the Peter Mintun Orchestra will be on offer (plus lots of free bubbly, duh.)
8pm-2am, $85-$195. Davies Symphony Hall, 201 Van Ness, SF. www.sfsymphony.org 
Next year will be pure fiyah if these dub and bass masters from favorite crews like Surya Dub, Dutty Artz, Que Bajo, and Tormenta Tropical have any say in the matter (they do). Cumbia, dancehall, tropical, and afro sounds — plus techno in the yard! — with Chief Boima, Kush Arora, Geko Jones, Mano, Uproot Andy, Ushka, Oro11, and many more. Hotness.
9pm-2am, $10-$20. Riddim, 581 Fifth St, Oakl. www.riddimdancehall.com  *