You thought the real Halloween parties started next weekend? Ha! Wrong on two counts.
For one, you're in San Francisco, so you know this is gonna be a ghoul gala that leaks out into the preceding and following weeks, if not months. Two, the portal to the other world opens the 22nd, not the 31st! (silly) Luckily, you have your deranged BDSM maniacs at the SF Citadel  to remind you of the fact with Chamber of Horrors. For those together enough to have assembled their monster 'fit early, a swell party to play out this journey into another realm where “the gods of old reach out from their dark place,” according to the press release. After all, what better place to witness the chaos that will ensue than a good old-fashioned dungeon? Whips at the ready, there's gonna be evil spirits to subdue.
Air Sex Championships
Will this be sexy? Will you learn anything from a passel of performers humping the air, licking the air, squeezing the air's titties? This grand tradition was started by a Japanese chap bereft of solid human beings to sex up. Now people across the world pretend, solo, on-stage, to being sexing – with clothes on. But will it... turn you on? For now, let's file under maybe, but the event warrants exploration.
Wed/20 8 p.m., $15
628 Divisadero, SF
Anal Pleasure for Couples
Honey a little wary of rear entry? Best to leave some things to the experts. Reassure them that nothing but good will befall them at this class with Lolo Winters, sex educator, who'll be teaching on toys, position, and pleasure. Open to all genders and orientations.
Wed/20 6-8 p.m., $20-$25
1620 Polk, SF
Chamber of Horrors
Hobgoblins and naughty, naughty night horrors reign at this dungeon play party. Get the Halloween heebie-jeebies started early and get in touch with your evil side.
Fri/22 8 p.m., $25
1277 Mission, SF
Steamworks Full Moon Party
Steamworks launches a new play party! How's it going to be different from their standard showers 'n' sex-a-thon? DJs? A $5 off discount when you tell them about the ad on their website? Sexy full moon graphics on the flier? Does it really matter – you're getting laid!
Fri/22-Sat/23 8 a.m., $17-55
2107 4th St., Berk.
Exotic Erotic Ball and Expo
Time for marabou, corsetry, and befeathered top hats! Exotic Erotic is back for its 31st year of SF-born and bred debauchery. This year the whole shebang is on the water at Craneway Pavilion and there will be porn star performers from across the globe (even a chance to make it with your favorite!), orgasmic bingo, the Family Stone on stage, and a slew of fine purveyors of lust capitalism at the accompanying EE Expo.
Expo: Fri/22 4 p.m.-midnight and Sat/23 noon-6 p.m., $20
Ball: Sat/23 8 p.m.-2 a.m., $79-169
1414 Harbour Way South, Richmond
Breast Workshop Fiesta
Because you know it's breast cancer awareness month – why not make it breast awareness month? Talking of tricks with the titties, Femina Potens is holding a special night of boobies, starring busty starlets Maxine Holloway and Bella Rossi, whose proceeds go straight to Shanti's Lifelines breast cancer program. Squeeze 'em, ladies.
Mon/25 6 p.m., $7-$20 sliding scale
2199 Market, SF