We're normally asses up here at the weekly sex events column, but for the purpose of January 19-26, we're asking you to lift another body part altogether: your pinky. That's because tonight (Weds/19) you'll get the chance to learn about an entirely refined BDSM social function, that being the tea party. Ms. Margaret, who used to coordinate educational services for the smOdyssey website as well as the Folsom Fringe conference, runs the classy "Tea With a Twist"  affair with long-time slave Erich. Rumor has it she never takes her tea the same way twice, for which you will learn the reason at this lace tablecloth-leather dress how-to affair.
Tea With a Twist
Why must all BDSM parties take place in a dungeon? What of the mistress that requires some amount of refinement and grace – not to mention finger food? These classy souls are invited to this primer on dom-sub tea time, sculpted by Ms. Margaret's “velvet glove over steel hand” mentality.
Weds/19 8 - 10 p.m., $15
Center for Sex and Culture
1519 Mission, SF
Raise your hand if you're an armpit man. (See how that works?) Chaps has got the jock-tastic bash for you this week. Pits is part of their fetish night series, so no longer will you be wondering if that hottie with the body holding the Jager bomb will mind if you want to grab him by the under-bicep. He's here too, ya know – just be prepared to give as you get, gentlemen.
1225 Folsom, SF
Radical Love Workshop
At some point in our lives, we've all wished we had this line on our resume: “revolutionary activist of the heart.” Sure you deserve it, sweets – but Wendy-O-Matic can say it with a straight face. Ms. O-Matic has spent years standing strong and educating on behalf of the polyamorous community, and now she's presenting this workshop at Mission Control on the ins-and-outs of loving whoever you damn well please, and sharing them with whomsoever you see fit -- with a basis on love and intimacy, not picking the right music for the orgy.
Thurs/20 7-9 p.m., $25 members only
2519 Mission, SF
Community Porn Forum
Skin flick performers get together to discuss the upcoming Cal OSHA meeting (the next is Feb/8) regarding occupational safety measures in the industry. The perfect chance, you XXXers, to learn about how you can tell the regulating body what you need to feel safe on the job – particularly regarding condom usage, a hot topic at recent meetings on the subject. MSM (male on male) performers especially encouraged to attend.
Fri/21 3 - 5 p.m., free
St. James' Infirmary
1372 Mission, SF
10th Annual Butch-Femme Holiday Party
Get all festive and feisty at this sexy winter ball. Of course, this being an all-lesbo affair, all manners of dress are welcome for the dancing and drinking – festive wear would be appropriate, but so too would be whatever 'fits you wanna rock for the evening. Event organizers would be thrilled to death if volunteers want to bring finger food, refreshments, ice, or wood for the outdoor fire. Outdoor fire? Now we're talking.
Sat/22 6 p.m. - midnight
411 28th St., Oakl.
Smack, suck, caress – and that's just before the tongue gets activated. Kissing is one of those arts that can get passed over in pursuit of the all-powerful O, but it's one of the most important (and public spaces friendly) weapon in your arsenal of sexual equanimity. Let sex educator Tracy Bartlett show you the ropes course to a good make-out sesh – grab your partner and get to mashin'.
Mon/24 6 - 8 p.m., $40-45/pair
1620 Polk, SF