By Juliette Tang
According to the "Passion for Christ Movement," or P4CM, "We want you to rock it, but you better have confidence. People will be clowning on you. If you walk into a 7-11, people will be joking and snickering, and you almost want to direct it to those people, telling them, 'You're all laughing, but probably cuz you're all still masturbating."
Is public humiliation really the cure for masturbation? Because we know that after your mom caught you masturbating that one time under the sheets, you completely stopped masturbating cold turkey. Riiiiight. Isn't it enough that every time you masturbate, God kills a kitten and an angel loses his wings? No, not according to P4CM, the masturbation experts:
More hilarious shirts after the jump:
Ex-homosexual. How sad. "I went all the way to Gay and all I got was this stupid t-shirt."
Ex-Hypocrite. This girl is a hypocrite if I've ever seen one. I know that's not Christian Rock on your iPod.
Ex-fornicator. Uh oh, I fornicate with my exes all the time. Ugh. Why can't I stop having ex-sex? It's not my fault I sent those late night text messages I swear! It's the stupid devil juice I drink at the sinful neighborhood bar.
Ex-Hustler. Hey look, it's Jesus! Don't feel so bad about yourself -- Jesus was an ex-hustler too.
Most Commented On
- ??? - May 22, 2013
- Yes, either rent control should be means tested or it - May 22, 2013
- The law already forbids them - May 22, 2013
- Which is perfectly legal. - May 22, 2013
- LOL, you can buy a house in Detroit for a dollar. - May 22, 2013
- That's right, he is in his late forties, has lived in that unit - May 22, 2013
- Rent control does not skew - May 22, 2013
- The point with SF is it's supposed (but over-rated) "diversity". - May 22, 2013
- Means Test - May 22, 2013
- I suspect that we cannot "agree" on that since the vast majority - May 22, 2013