Alt.sex.column

Dammit

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I'm a woman, and my partner is too. We've agreed that for now, when we have sex outside our relationship, we'll have safe(r) sex. Another woman I'm dating is a major squirter, as in I need goggles and a raincoat. Next time we want to use a harness. However, I'm concerned that there's no safe way; when she comes (and she comes bucketloads), won't her ejaculate get into me?

I've thought about wrapping up with Saran Wrap and making a hole for the dildo, but that still doesn't seem like it would stop it all. Read more »

Ape-man

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I just read your question in the Slate article (www.slate.com/id/2174411) that asks sex columnists what puzzles them. For you, it was, in short, "Why homophobia?"

I'm convinced that boys learn it from their peers. Once a person is labeled gay, that person is marked for ostracism. A boy who comes to the defense of a gay boy pretty much guarantees that he'll be lumped in with the gay boy, so a powerful taboo is set up. Read more »

Duck's breath

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I just found your column by accident, and I love it! Read more »

Re-re-recap

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Readers:

Do you remember where we left off last week? I'd wanted to write about the now semirecent research on circumcision and sensitivity, but I spent so much time patting Another Concerned Penis Owner on the, uh, head, about harboring what was probably too much bitterness about having been clipped as a kid that I ran out of space and time. Read more »

RECAP recap

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Readers:

Since the major anticircumcision group is called, rather cleverly, RECAP (RECover A Penis), and since the letter below refers to an exchange in the column going back years, I think a recap might be in order. Way back when, I briefly shared the militantly anticirc bench with the rest of the loons, although I must admit I did not much enjoy their company. Read more »

Plus ca change

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

Why, umpteen zillion years into the AIDS era (I used to volunteer for Gay Men's Health Crisis in the 1980s), is there still no useful data about the risks of oral sex for men? Have we really learned nothing since the first appearance of "Low risk but not no risk"? Read more »

Hurt!

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I have recently discovered that I'm one of those lucky women who can ejaculate. Hooray! Except when it gets really wet and wild, I am plagued by a burning sensation. It isn't enough to stop the action, but it's annoying, and makes me think that I'm hurting myself. Could it be that my boyfriend's super-rough hands are giving me microscopic little cuts? It gets pretty heavy at times. Read more »

Just do it

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

That nursing column wasn't real, right? Read more »

A big how-to

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear readers:

The subject of size-discordant couples, discussed here recently, is a perennial favorite and will only get more so until such a time as we USA-ians fulfill our currently apparent destiny and become a nation of like-size giants in both height and girth. Till then, though, making a couple's ends meet will continue to be an issue and a puzzlement. Read more »

Sucks to be you

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andrea@altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

My wife and I are the proud parents of an eight-month-old boy. While I was prepared for the postpartum lull in the bedroom, I was not at all prepared for the combination of sex and nursing.

My wife has gotten really into attachment parenting and co-sleeping and it took me a while to get comfortable with having sex with the baby in the bed, but, generally, my appreciation for the rare opportunity always ends up outweighing any discomfort. Read more »