andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I have had a fetish for ticklish women all my life. (I used to like tickling my sisters, even, although I guess that sounds kind of weird now that I think of it in this context. But I swear it wasn't "like that" at the time.) But especially since I've been having sex with women, I've liked tickling them. Mostly they don't want me too, so I don't, but I end up frustrated because tickling really turns me on. There are videos on the Internet and I do watch those, but I want a real-life girlfriend to tickle! Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Andrea is currently on vacation. This column originally ran in June 2006.

Dear Andrea:

About getting past my gag reflex while giving blow jobs: I have no idea of what's the best way to practice this. I've tried bananas, but honestly that was just weird. I never bothered trying to deep-throat my ex because he was happy with a hand job. The new boyfriend has expressed much interest in it, and I think trying to deep-throat without practice first would be really awful. Any books on this? Recommended dildos? Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Andrea is on vacation. This column originally ran 5/21/08.

Dear Andrea:

I'm confused. Are there any guys out there who aren't at the extremes as far as sex goes? My ex-boyfriend was completely obsessed. Not only did he want it four-plus times a day, he'd want to have phone sex at least twice a day when we were apart. I think of myself as a pretty sexual person, but even I have my limits. Plus phone sex was boring. I like to masturbate, but it's hard for me to orgasm when I feel the person on the end of the line is waiting. Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

My lover and I have amazing sex. We love each other dearly too. We've been seeing each other for three years with no decrease in intensity. I'm 45, he's 37, and I've got two kids (who are older, so they cannot be held responsible for the following problem).

A few times lately when we've made love, I have had a small bowel movement. I always have multiple orgasms and there is squirting involved (which he really gets off on), which involves sort of bearing down. This has only happened three times in all, I think. But I'm horrified. Read more »

Dear Andrea:

I've read your column (and other sex columns) for years, and one thing I always notice you saying is that all fantasies are OK, and fantasizing about something can't hurt anything. But what if you don't think your fantasy is OK? I'm a lesbian, I have a girlfriend, and we have a pretty satisfying sex life. Even so, I'd understand why if I (or my girlfriend) were fantasizing about other women, or about things that we're just not going to do, like S&M (some of our friends are into it but it's not for us) or threesomes. But I'm not. I'm fantasizing about guys! Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

We were watching Mythbusters and they were using inflatable dolls instead of crash test dummies. That didn't work very well, but it did make me wonder, does anyone ever use those for actual sex?

Love,

Blow Me Down

Dear Blow:

Who knows? Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

I am straight (?), married 12 years, and have always been faithful to my husband. Before we were together, I had sex with a few boyfriends — nothing crazy. I did used to have fantasies about women, though; like, while trying to have an orgasm, I would think about a woman going down on me instead. Not any particular woman, just a kind of idea of femaleness. But I never did anything about it, or even particularly thought I wanted to.

Now, though, my husband has a lot of business trips, so I'm alone a lot, and lonely. Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

Back in my wild and crazy early 20s, I met a beautiful man through his 17-year- old brother. The brother asked him to buy cigarettes, so without really investigating, I assumed this guy was at least 18. That evening, we hooked up and began a whirlwind romance. A few days later, I received a lecture from the 17-year-old about how I really shouldn't be messing around with his baby brother. Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Andrea:

The woman I just started seeing likes fooling around for hours with all our clothes on and isn't ready for sex. I like waiting too, except I have a medical condition called varicoceles, which means I have to wear tidy-whities whenever I walk around. Read more »

andrea@mail.altsexcolumn.com

Dear Readers:

WebMD sent out this slightly goofy "10 Amazing Health Benefits of Sex." Among the benefits of "healthy loving in a relationship," according to the article (summaries mine) are:

1. Less stress: Volunteers kept sex diaries and were then subjected to stressful situations. Read more »