CHEAP EATS Cousin Raym is a doctor and works at Kent State. He gets to come to San Francisco for conferences, and I get to take him around for sushi, and clam chowder in a sourdough bowl, and all the things he loves that you can't get in Ohio. Good sushi, I mean. This has happened two years in a row, and that means he has seen me more than anyone else in my family who doesn't live here.
Raym is 50 years old and still plays tackle football. We tried his hand or feet at soccer, and he didn't get a lot done but did have fun. Read more »
A small peeve of mine is grappa served at or near room temperature, as if it's cough syrup. Perhaps I am churlish to complain about tepid grappa when having the chance to order grappa at all is a rare treat; even many Italian restaurants don't offer it. On the other hand, ice-cold grappa is simply sublime at least for those of us who find it so and keeping the bottle stashed in the freezer under the bar doesn't seem like a terrible burden. Read more »
New restaurants, like trees and kings, have a way of rising from the remains of fallen ones: the restaurant is dead, long live the restaurant. This only makes sense. In the typical hermit-crab situation, a kitchen of some kind is already in place, there might also be some serviceable tables and chairs, and the permit jabberwocky will be slightly less daunting. Easier all the way around.
But this is not the only means of passing fortune's baton. Read more »
CHEAP EATS The hawks are looking hungry. My chickens are scared. Me too. We spend a lot of time in the bushes, plucking and preening and trying to act casual. And while they're scratching for bugs, I'm collecting dandelion greens for my salad. The price of lettuce has literally brought me to my knees.
You're thinking: Lettuce? The price of lettuce?
Yeah, well, maybe you don't know how much salad I eat. (A: a lot.) My favorite statistic says that when they have unlimited access to grass, chickens will eat it more than anything. Read more »
The backs and bin bottoms of refrigerators are known hazmat zones: difficult-to-reach, easy-to-ignore regions where spontaneous composting occurs. Most of us, I suspect, have at one time or another fished a plastic bag from these sepulchral depths and wondered what once fresh but long neglected foodstuff could have produced the black-green goo inside.
The far reaches of kitchen cabinetry don't generally host this sort of putrefaction, but they are venues for the forgotten bottle of this and overlooked box of that all the same. Read more »
"Are we on the San Andreas Fault?" my companion asked uneasily as we stepped from the car and stood looking at the Bella Vista Continental Restaurant, lit up like something out of a Hans Christian Andersen tale in the soft winter gloaming. "No," I said. Read more »
CHEAP EATS The word she uses is "flexitarian." I seldom run retractions. Not that I never get anything wrong; on the contrary, my impressions of reality are so impressionistic, it would be a stretch to say that I ever exactly get anything right.
This can cause problems.
Give you an example: I want to know what time Penny's opens for lunch. I look it up. Cheap Eats, Penny's Caribbean Café, says right there: 11:30 a.m. So I write to Lisa Bitch Magazine, and I say, "Dear Ms. Magazine, Hi! How are you? Read more »
These days everyone is a gourmand, and caring about the earth is so cool it's made even Al Gore popular. The time is ripe to give a fuck.
But all this focus on artisanal and organic products is complicated. What's easiest for the consumer to understand isn't always correct. Stickers can't always be trusted. And certified or not nothing holds a candle to family tradition.
It's true for tomatoes. It's true for tangerines. Read more »
During these past six lovely years of Bush and Cheney, one has become almost nostalgic about duels the calling out of adversaries to settle matters of honor with pistols even if one or both adversaries should hold high office. Read more »
An old rule of prudence teaches that you should never eat raw oysters in a month whose name doesn't have an "r" in it from May to August, more or less the warm-weather months elevating the danger of spoilage. Rain and cold do present their inconveniences and discomforts, but they are also balm in the matter of seafood, most of which is delicate and turns bad easily if the temperature starts to rise. Read more »