Valentine’s Day can be a sneaky, if not downright dangerous, holiday. It has a way of rushing you on the 12th, taking you down in the tackle on the 13th, and -- if you fail to deliver the gifty goods -- knocking you out on the 14th. Fortunately for you, you’re still in the 7-day-advance safety zone, with enough time to perfect your game plan. To help you avoid an embarrassing fumble, we’ve scoured SF’s best gift and novelty stores for some guaranteed-to-please gift ideas. Read more »
Putting together a good date can be like planning a bank robbery. You're investing time, you’re fronting a bunch of money, and you’re coordinating complicated logistics — all in hopes of breaking the law. In this case, Murphy's Law. I mean, let's face it, half the time Valentine's Day dates carry so much nervous tension and promptitude that we should all consider ourselves lucky if we wake up on February 15 with all our fingers — never mind whether we wake up alone! Read more »
My girlfriend leaned over the table during brunch at the Pork Store recentlyand stared deep into my eyes. "Baby," she said, "when you're out there looking at all those boobies today, just remember that they're fake. And when you're petting asses and sticking money in G-strings, just remember that those bodies, unlike mine, are going to be saggy and horrible-looking in a few years."
Not exactly our ordinary breakfast conversation, but then again, it was no ordinary morning. Read more »
Let's talk about porn honestly. Porn is about making money. Despite any pretense to producing beautiful art, hot erotica, or well-crafted portrayals of masculinity at its most intense, money is what makes everybody cum. I've dealt with "regular" filmmakers, even fancied myself as one for a while. Yet at the end of the day I don't believe strongly enough in the power of the movie medium to justify the expense, time, and effort it takes to create a masterful mainstream film. Read more »
"Amor del Mar" Aquarium of the Bay at Pier 39, Embarcadero at Bay; 623-5323, www.aquariumofthebay.com. Wed/14, 7pm, $125 single, $200 couple. Support the nonprofit Aquarium of the Bay Foundation during this romantic evening featuring cocktails, culinary delights, and a live salsa band.
"Cupid Stunt Club Neon's Third Annual Valentine's Day Underwear Party" Rickshaw Stop, 155 Fell; 861-2011, www.neonsf.com. Wed/14, 9pm, $10. Read more »
I have a small penis, and I want my wife to have sex with a man more endowed than me, but I don't know how to approach her regarding this.
Small but Fearless
I'm trying to re-create in my head the conversation from the other week which culminated in my suggesting that someone could really clean up at Cafe Press with an "Ask Me about My Small Penis" T-shirt. Read more »
It's a lucid time line of 230 years of American wars and conflicts. It's a well-researched text, footnoted from sources as varied as international newspapers, Department of Defense documents, and transcripts of speeches from scores of world leaders. Read more »
TECHSPLOITATION On the morning of Jan. 24, Fyodor Vaskovich awoke to discover that his Web site, SecLists.org, had been transformed into a giant error message. The message said his domain couldn't be resolved. This troubled him greatly: SecLists is an archive of several computer securityrelated mailing lists that contains more than 50,000 pages of technical information. It has thousands of visitors per day and nets Vaskovich a fair amount of income from Google ads. Where had the site gone? Read more »
For the better part of a year starting in late 2005, San Francisco blogger Mr. Spocko waged a quiet campaign against right-wing talk radio station KSFO, 560 AM. He wrote to its sponsors and played for them explicit portions of the station's programming, such as shock jock Lee Rodgers's call for antiwar protesters to be "stomped to death ... just stomp their bleeping guts out."
The idea was to educate corporations about exactly what they were sponsoring, in the hope that Spocko's work might staunch the free flow of hateful rhetoric. Read more »